Random Jottings from (",)::~~~ the Absolutely Hilarious, Fabulously Wonderful Guy!

Glorious, Simply Glorious!

By LOLA OGUNNAIKE
Published: August 31, 2004

In the pages of King, a bimonthly men's magazine for the rims, bling and sneakers set, one thing is prized more than a taut waistline and a pretty face, shapely legs or a perky bosom: a large behind.

"That's what our readers have come to expect from us," said Datwon Thomas, King's editor since it began publishing three years ago. "They want to see the thick girls, the girls with..." Mr Thomas, a 29-year-old married father of two, stammered here, searching for a description that would work in the pages of a family newspaper, "...with, you know, a big backside."

On the surface, King, a spinoff of the popular hip-hop magazine XXL, owned by Harris Publications, appears to follow the same formula that lad mags like Maxim, FHM and Stuff have used to great success. Hot girl on the cover. More hot girls in various stages of undress on the inside. Fast cars, expensive gadgets, even the occasional article thrown in for good measure. The difference is one of audience.

King is the leader in a small but growing market of magazines that cater primarily to young African-American men. According to a report released this month by the Audit Bureau of Circulations for the six-month period ending on June 30, King's paid circulation grew by 52.2 percent, to 227,323. Other magazines in the category include BlackMen and Smooth.

"We've positioned ourselves to be the black Maxim," said Sean Cummings, Smooth's editor. Mr Cummings said that his magazine, which is not audited by ABC, has also had double-digit gains this year, growing to a circulation of 150,000 from 80,000 in the last 12 months. BlackMen's circulation, according to ABC, grew to 103,000 from just over 80,000 in the same period. (Maxim, has a circulation of more than 2.5 million, up a tiny amount over last year.)

Their circulations may be small, but the relative success of King and the others has not come as a surprise to some publishing analysts.

"The magazine industry has largely ignored the young black male reader," said Reed Phillips, a partner in DeSilva & Phillips, a media investment banking company that specializes in the magazine industry. "Publishers think they pick them up with music magazines like The Source, XXL and Vibe, so as a result there has been a void."

But beyond the desire to tap into an underserved market, these magazines are also presenting an alternative image of beauty. And that, Mr Cummings argues, is the great and somewhat subversive thing about them. "These books allow us to celebrate the beauty of our women without compromise," he said. "For years magazines like FHM, Maxim and Stuff have showed you their idea of beauty - a blond and blue-eyed 110-pound woman. Now we're showing you ours."

That may sound like a high-minded justification for running layouts of nearly naked women. Yet even if that is the case, there is no question that these nearly naked girls look decidedly different than the nearly naked girls one finds in large-circulation mainstream magazines. Few are white and none are model thin. "It's safe to say that our girls would probably not appear in the pages of Vogue," Mr Thomas said, chuckling. "Anna Wintour would be like, 'Honey, stop with the cupcakes.' "

Mr Cummings said the measurements of the quintessential Smooth girl would be approximately 36-24-38, he added.

Andy Clerkson, editorial director of Dennis Publishing, the company behind Maxim and Stuff, said his magazines did not have a type. Last year, he pointed out, 5 of the 12 women who appeared on the cover of Maxim were not white. "We're looking at female celebrities who reflect the national demographic, and if that's Beyonce or Anna Kournikova or Lucy Liu, so be it," he said. Fame more than anything dictates his magazine's choices, he said.

Jayson Rodriguez, a 25-year-old graduate student at New York University, said he skipped over the mainstream lad magazines at newsstands and headed straight for King and Smooth. "I'm not interested in the Anna Kournikovas and Paris Hiltons of the world," Mr Rodriguez said. But the magazines provide more than an opportunity to ogle women with hour (and a half) glass figures, he was quick to explain. The magazines' "irreverent humor" and unique take on the world at large attract him, too.

"When I read Esquire and GQ, I feel like I'm broke," he said. "When I read King and Smooth, they make me laugh. I can relate. It feels like I'm talking to my boys."

BY KARIN FLEMING AND JACQUELINE HENNESSY
From Chatelaine

Every culture has its own special folk medicines
IN TRINIDAD people soothe itchy skin with an oatmeal paste. Ukrainian families use chamomile for insomnia. Jamaicans use pain-relief medications that grow wild in their gardens. Here's an eclectic mix of home remedies that doctors from around the world say may reduce symptoms and give comfort for what ails you.

Aches and Pains
Dr Bud Rickhi, a Trinidadian-born associate professor of medicine at the University of Calgary and director of the Research Centre for Alternative Medicine, says devil's claw, a herb with claw-shaped leaves that grows in the Amazon, fends off joint pain. "Village healers know how powerful it is," he says. And so do those suffering from rheumatism and arthritis, according to medical herbalist Christopher Robbins, author of The Household Herbal: A Complete Practical Guide to Plants That Heal and Natural Pharmacy.

Recent British and German studies show the herb reduces pain and inflammation in the joints. But don't take it if you're pregnant: It may stimulate the uterine muscles during pregnancy. You can buy devil's-claw teas or ointments at most health-food stores.

Colds
In southern India a spicy, watery soup called rassam is thought to help relieve cold symptoms. Dr Elizabeth Thakkar, a family physician from Calgary, adds to 5 mL (1 tsp.) of light olive oil, a pinch of mustard seeds, a few curry leaves and lightly sautés with three cloves of minced garlic. Then she adds 5 mL of ground cumin and 5 mL of ground black pepper, three fresh tomatoes, blanched and peeled, 500 mL (2 cups) water and a pinch of salt. She brings the mixture to a boil and simmers for five minutes.

Although the tomatoes contain lycopene, a natural antioxidant that protects cells from damage, it's the spice, according to Earl Mindell, that provides the most relief. A Canadian professor of nutrition at Pacific Western University in Los Angeles and author of Earl Mindell's Food as Medicine: What You Can Eat to Help Prevent Everything from Colds to Heart Disease to Cancer he explains that black pepper is thermogenic -- creating heat in the body, which speeds up the metabolism and jump-starts the immune system.

For coughs that accompany colds, says a Ukrainian tradition, stock up on garlic. Because Ukrainian society is agrarian, people use their gardens to help keep them healthy. Ukrainians add garlic to many dishes. Modern research confirms its ability to fight viral infections and strep throat.

Garlic acts like a mild antifungal and antibiotic through the release of aromatic chemicals, including allicin, in the body. Raw garlic is the most effective, but it can cause gastrointestinal upset. If so, try garlic supplements, available at most pharmacies and health-food stores.

Related Links The following links are for informational and educational use only. For diagnoses and treatment of any illness, always consult a health-care professional. Garden Guides Herb Guide: Herbal Home Remedies, Herbs and Pregnancy, Preparing Medicinal Herbs Drugstore.com Herbal Remedies Botanical.com Home page of A Modern Herbal by Mrs M. Grieve, originally published 1931

Constipation
Chinese rhubarb is the main ingredient in an Asian prescription for constipation. Purée three Chinese rhubarb stalks (not to be confused with garden rhubarb), add 250 mL (1 cup) apple juice, 1 L (4 cups) of water, 1/4 peeled lemon and 15 mL (1 tbsp.) honey. Bring it to a boil and simmer for 20 minutes. According to Dr Joseph Yuk-Shing Wong, a Toronto physician specializing in physical medicine and rehabilitation, the ingredients are natural laxatives that also boost the digestive system.

Cuts
In Zimbabwe golden honey goes into the medicine chest. "My family was fortunate to have beehives in our backyard. If any of us had a cut that wouldn't heal, the best remedy was fresh honey," says Zimbabwe-born Dr Mohamed Ravalia, a family physician in Twillingate, Newfoundfland. Because honey absorbs the water on skin that bacteria need to grow, it has antibacterial properties. Ravalia's advice is to apply honey directly to a minor cut and cover it with gauze. However, only raw, unprocessed honey contains the vitamins, minerals and enzymes that can help wounds to heal.

Indigestion
Rickhi says Trinidadians grow ginger instead of buying antacids. Fresh or dried ginger can be added to food or made into a tea. Add 5 mL (1 tsp.) ginger to your favourite tea blend. Also recommended for nausea and ulcer pain, ginger reduces stomach irritation and helps produce digestive juices.

Instead of after-dinner mints, many East Indian restaurants serve dainty bowls of fennel seeds. Thakkar says fennel helps your body digest a spicy meal. To decrease flatulence and ease indigestion, drink fennel tea, available at most health-food stores. The Calgary physician says nursing mothers in India often drink the tea to help soothe their colicky babies. Mindell explains that fennel has the added benefit of stimulating milk production in lactating women.

Insomnia
"In Trinidad we would give little sachets of lavender to new parents, who put them in cribs to help babies sleep," says Rickhi. Lavender is a relaxing herb that affects your nervous system and may decrease your breathing and heart rate during a period of anxiety. For best results, Rickhi advises putting a few drops of lavender oil on your pillow before going to bed.

The Ukrainian remedy for sleeplessness is nothing more complicated than a cup of chamomile tea. A mild sedative, chamomile reduces anxiety and tension, especially before you go to bed.

Sore throat
Dr Marlyn Cook, a Grand Rapids First Nation family physician in Winnipeg, says that to soothe a sore throat, drink a sage infusion: Put 10 mL (2 tsp.) of fresh or home-dried sage into 625 mL (2-1/2 cups) of boiling water, simmer for 20 minutes, then strain off the leaves. Drink or gargle with 250 mL (1 cup) of the sage tea for soothing relief.

Robbins says sage is a natural astringent and antiseptic, which is recommended for gingivitis and throat infections. However, Robbins cautions women not to take it during pregnancy. As with any herbal, he notes, this plant should be treated with the same respect as any other medication. Consult your physician for more information.

Note:
Some points and clarification have been added by Azlan Adnan.

...and Go to Heaven

A lawyer died. At the same moment, the Pope also died. They arrived at the gates of heaven at the same moment. They spend the day in orientation, and as they're getting their heavenly vestments, the Pope gets a plain white toga and wings, like everyone else, and the lawyer gets much finer apparel, made of gold thread, and Gucci shoes.

Then, they get to see where they're going to live. The Pope gets what everyone else gets, a replica of a Holiday Inn room, and the lawyer gets an 18-room mansion with servants and a swimming pool. At dinnertime, the Pope receives the standard meal, a kosher TV dinner, but the lawyer receives a five-course meal including caviar, prime rib and chocolate truffles.

By this time, the lawyer is beginning to suspect that an error has been made, so he asks one of the angels in charge, "Has there been some kind of mistake? This guy was the Pope, and he gets what everyone else gets, and I'm just a lawyer and I'm getting the finest of everything?"

The angel replied, "No mistake, sir. We've had lots of Popes here, but you're the first lawyer we've ever had."

BAD JOKE DISCLAIMER: We recognize that religious humour can be risky. It is our hope that by laughing at ourselves (and others) we can make this subject more approachable. If you find any of these objectionable, we apologize. Many were passed along via email and others spotted on other websites. As with most jokes, the original authors are unknown -- but we thank them.

Copyright 2003-2004 Azlan Adnan Legal Notice

Secrets of My Current Success

Many of you who have seen me recently have asked me how come I have lost so much weight. The answer is careful selection of what to eat and what not to eat. Let's start with what not to eat. My doctor calls them the:

Five Deadly White Sins:

White Rice - Polished grains are some of the greatest causes of modern disease. Try eating pulut hitam instead.

White Flour - Try eating atta flour (from which chappatis are made), instead.

Sugar - Refined sugar is a sweet poison. Try consuming raw sugar like gula melaka or raw, unprocessed honey instead. Much of the goodness of raw, unprocessed honey comes from the enzymes present. Therefore, always consume raw, unprocessed honey as heat and pasteurisation deactivates the enzymes. Similarly, do not refrigerate honey as the cold also deactivates the enzymes. Also use a plastic or porcelain spoon with honey as heavy metals are leached from metal spoons. Raw unprocessed honey from Iran cost RM60 a kg but you can get similar raw, unprocessed honey from Vietnam at Giant supermarket at RM9.59 a kg (expiry June 30, 2006) or RM9.99 a kg (expiry June 30, 2007).

Salt - Causes hypertension.

Milk ~ Milk has fallen out of favour because of the antibiotics and growth hormones used in modern farming methods. If you can get milk that come from animals not given antibiotics and hormones, then, it's fine. By the same token, you should avoid beef and chicken. Lamb and mutton are generally okay as they are not fed with growth hormones. As the hormones have no effect on them, farmers do not waste money by injecting them with hormones.

---

Food rich in pectin enable toxins to be eliminated from our bodies. Pectin binds with the free radicals of these toxins and enable them to be eliminated by the liver and kidneys. Pectin-rich foods are:

Grapefruits

Lemons

Pomelos

Apples

Eat also dates, as they contain many complex sugars and are nutritious.

Copyright 2003-2004 Azlan Adnan Legal Notice

Fourteen Foods That Will Change Your Life

Book Description

SuperFoods Rx is based on a simple but profound premise: some foods are dramatically better than others for our health and longevity.

Sure, everyone knows that an apple is a better snack than potato chips, but do you know that a daily handful of walnuts or a bowl of blueberries can actually improve your well-being and longevity?

Steven Pratt, MD, witnessed the positive results that occurred when his patients with age-related macular degeneration changed their diets to include certain powerhouse foods -- those he has identified as SuperFoods. Backed by proven research on fourteen of the most nutrient-dense foods, this book puts these tools in your hands, and on your plate, to give you more energy, greater protection against disease, and a healthy lifestyle now and for the future.

Whether you're 63 or 23, now is the right time to start eating the SuperFoods way. By making these foods part of your regular eating habits, you can actually change the course of your biochemistry and stop the incremental changes in your body that lead to diseases such as type II diabetes, hypertension, certain cancers, obesity, and Alzheimer's.

What are the fourteen SuperFoods? Many may already be part of your daily meals, while some may make occasional appearances. But all are supermarket-friendly nutrition powerhouses:

• Beans • Blueberries • Broccoli • Oats • Oranges • Pumpkin • Salmon
• Soy • Spinach • Tea -- green or black • Tomatoes • Turkey • Walnuts • Yogurt

SuperFoods Rx not only outlines the amazing health benefits of these fourteen foods, it also includes delicious recipes, kitchen tips, and shopping suggestions that will make the SuperFoods lifestyle simple and irresistible.

Don't like tomatoes? Not to worry; almost all of the SuperFoods have sidekicks -- or substitutions -- that you can enjoy instead. Have some lycopene-rich red watermelon
or pink grapefruit
instead of tomatoes.

Can't bear the thought of spinach? Choose from a list of other dark leafy greens, romaine lettuce, or orange bell peppers.

In SuperFoods Rx, Dr Pratt leads you from the twentieth-century world of macronutrients -- proteins, fats, and carbohydrates -- into the twenty-first-century world of micronutrients -- phytonutrients, carotenoids, and antioxidants. You'll find:

Individual chapters dedicated to each of the fourteen SuperFoods, with the health benefits for each outlined and supported by Dr. Pratt's research, along with ideas for simple ways to get more of these foods into your everyday meals.

Fifty original recipes featuring SuperFoods, especially developed by Chef Michel Stroot of the world-renowned Golden Door Spa.

A shopping list of brand-name foods to ensure you're buying the most nutrient-dense SuperFoods available.

Guidelines for formulating your daily nutrient goals and supplement recommendations.

With Dr Pratt to guide you through the new nutritional frontier, you will be able to choose and enjoy the foods that are most beneficial to your health, well-being, and longevity.

SuperFoods Rx. You'll feel super.

To get a copy of his book, click here.

# posted by (",)azlan::~~~ @ 12:52

What happens in the bedroom stays in the bedroom

And that could very well be the problem for many couples. There are plenty of people out there who are afflicted with one issue or another when it comes to sex. But sweeping these problems under the rug has become all too common. Despite society's obsession with sex, when it comes to discussing our own woes between the sheets, we have a tendency to become very tight-lipped.

Well the doctor is in and he's made it his mission to help those folks who are struggling, sexually speaking. Ian Kerner, PhD, has the love touch and he's sharing his healing powers with you readers. Although he's battled his own sexual demons, he's not just speaking from experience. Kerner holds a doctorate in Clinical Sexology and is the author of She Comes First: the Thinking Man's Guide to Pleasuring a Woman (HarperCollins).

"I suffered with sexual dysfunction and inadequacy," he tells us from his New York office. "I tried a lot of different ways of dealing, including sex therapy. I was so inspired and transformed by the experience that when I had to change careers and start down a new path, I decided to study human sexuality and sex therapy."

In addition to being on the faculty of the American Academy of Clinical Sexologists, Ian is certified by the American Board of Sexology and is also a member of The Society for the Scientific Study of Sexuality and their sister-organization, The American Association of Sex Educators, Counselors and Therapists.

Since working out the kinks in his own sex life, Kerner, who's happily married, has been counseling others for the last five years. These days he's most commonly treating couples in their twenties and thirties.

Some common maladies from women include: no enjoyment out of sex, faking orgasms or lack of orgasms in their relationship. Men, on the other hand, suffer from premature ejaculation or some sort of sexual anxiety that prevents them from being in a committed relationship.

Couples often are afflicted with mismatched libidos, low desire, infidelity or sex ruts. Kerner points out that when the "honeymoon period" of the relationship ends, the thrill is gone. People might think there is something wrong with them, but it's simply a matter of learning how to move from the initial phase into a long-term committed relationship with an exciting sex life.

You don't necessarily have to seek out the help of a sex therapist right off the bat, he says. There are measures you can take to improve the quality of your sex life. The first step is leaving your problems at the door. Don't let your troubles with money, work or family seep into your sex life. Communicating with your partner is also essential. Talk about your sexuality and discuss intimacy issues instead of shutting each other out.

"I think very often reading a book or even being inspired by a magazine can help," Ian says. "Start your own path of communication. Sometimes a therapist is a good idea. People often need a moderated environment with a professional who has a process of allowing couples to communicate with each other and then offering clinically-proven therapy solutions to address the problems.

"It also depends on the nature of the problem and relationship. It's important to note that therapy isn't just for when things are terrible. Therapy can be a healthy way of contextualizing issues and facilitating the process of communication."

In this exclusive article, Kerner shares 10 secrets to revving up a stalled sex life.

1. Take foreplay out of the bedroom. Make it part of the fabric of your life -- whether it's public displays of affection, sexy emails, dinner on the town or dancing. The best sex often happens outside the bedroom. People in a healthy, growing relationship have a lot in common, as well as respect each other's differences. This provides the best impetus for having a good sex life.

2. Just do it. Many of us are slow starters sexually. Once you get going it's much easier to build and maintain momentum. Like exercise, sometimes you have to make the decision to do it. It may seem like a bit of a chore. However, once intercourse is underway you're enjoying yourself and things continue from there.

3. Be physical without the expectation of sex. Focus on kissing, hugging, cuddling, talking and holding hands. Feel free to be physical with each other without the expectation that it's going to lead to sexual intercourse. Physical affection and intimacy doesn't always have to lead to sex. Removing expectations allows us to be more intimate with each other.

4. Get into a present state of mind. Let go of your stress and anxiety. Try and leave a lot of the issues you might be worrying about outside the bedroom door. Turn sex into a present moment experience. Let go of your relationship baggage. Even if you're having issues in your relationship, that doesn't mean you can't have fun, enjoyable sex.

5. Fantasize. Give yourself permission to fantasize. Fantasize during sex -- even if it's about someone else. Talk about your fantasies with each other. People should remember the brain is the biggest sex organ. The brain is often the biggest aphrodisiac. We sometimes are so uncomfortable at the thought of communicating. Once you break the ice and start talking about your turn-offs, turn-ons and fantasies, it spices things up quickly.

6. Turn foreplay into coreplay. Break out of "intercourse discourse." We are so caught up with penis/vagina intercourse being in dominant mode. The dominant way to achieve sexual satisfaction often becomes routine and familiar. It quickly becomes all about intercourse. Turn foreplay into coreplay by focusing on kissing, touching, manual stimulation and oral stimulation. All of these things add excitement. Full-body sexuality adds a new dimension to your experience.

7. Pleasure yourself. Clinical studies show that couples with healthy sex lives masturbate more often. You can be in a healthy relationship, have a healthy sex life and still masturbate. Masturbation is a good way to jumpstart the libido.

8. Become comfortable in your own body. This used to apply mainly to women, but it also affects men. Poor body image is a major source of anxiety. We're often unaware of how anxiety inhibits us sexually. It can cripple who you are. You have to be comfortable in your own skin.

9. Think about a program of sexual fitness that includes balanced diet, exercise, stress management and erotic creativity. Our libido is a barometer of our overall sense of wellness. Very often we see couples who aren't having sex as much as they used to. They don't experience desire and arousal regularly. Oftentimes, they're also overweight. They smoke, drink or take some kind of prescription medicine. They've stopped exercising. These factors all impact desire and libido. Sex isn't something that happens independently of everything else that's going on in your life. You have to think holistically when in terms of wellness and how to improve your sex life.

10. Adrenaline makes the heart grow fonder. By studying neuroscience, Kerner has learned how the brain functions in all phases of a relationship. In the initial phase, when you're madly in love, the brain produces dopamine and neuropinephrine. These chemicals contribute to a sense of excitement and exhilaration. Once we graduate past the initial stages of first love into a more mature relationship, those chemicals start to wane. Part of the reason so many people cheat is not because they crave sex, it's because they crave the excitement, the newness and the danger that comes along with cheating. Fortunately, we know through clinical studies that couples can restimulate the chemicals by doing new things together.

11. (Bonus!) Communicate about sex. One thing many couples don't talk about is sex. They talk about other aspects of their relationship -- children, money, future plans, in-laws -- but not sex. Sexual dissatisfaction is one of the leading causes of divorce in this country. We can't deal with this statistic unless we start talking more openly about our sex lives with each other. One of the greatest things about a sex therapist is that this person gets couples comfortable with talking about their sexuality. Once you break the ice and start doing it, the floodgates open. When couples get in synch with each other, this really helps boost their desire.

To get a copy of his book, click here.

Eating fish may help your health
even if you only eat it occasionally

After analyzing several large studies, researchers concluded that a minimal amount of fish in the diet may be enough to confer the benefit of reduced stroke risk. According to study reviews, eating fish as seldom as 1 to 3 times per month was enough to have a beneficial effect on the risk of ischemic stroke, the most common kind of stroke.

Benefit:
Eating at least 1 serving of fish per week can make you up to 2.7 years younger. Although eating fish as seldom as 1 to 3 times per month may be enough to provide some protection against stroke, a recent study revealed that eating fish weekly could reduce stroke risk by as much as 13 percent, compared to people who ate fish less often than once per month.

Caution:
Certain kinds of fish may contain high levels of mercury, a trace metal that is found in the environment and is toxic to humans. Choose your fish wisely. Long-lived fish, such as swordfish, shark, tilefish, king mackerel, red snapper, and orange roughy, tend to have the highest mercury levels.

Reference:
Fish consumption and incidence of stroke: a meta-analysis of cohort studies. He, K., Song, Y., Daviglus, M. L., Liu, K., Van Horn, L., Dyer, A. R., Goldbourt, U., Greenland, P., Stroke 2004 Jul;35(7):1538-1542. Epub 2004 May 20.

Copyright 2003-2004 Azlan Adnan Legal Notice

Sex Education Primer for Parents

Charlotte E. Grayson, MD
Senior Medical Editor

Sexuality is an important part of being human. It involves more than the physical act of intercourse with another person. It affects how we feel about ourselves as males and females, and even impacts some of the choices we make. That is why it is a good idea to talk to your kids about sex. They are going to learn about it somewhere, so it is best that they learn it from their parents. The best age to have the discussion is when your children become teenagers.

Why Should I Talk to my Kids About Sex?

Talking with your teenager is important to helping him or her develop healthy attitudes toward sex and to learn responsible sexual behavior. Openly discussing sex with your child also enables you to provide accurate information. After all, teens will learn about sex somewhere. But what they learn might not be true, and might not reflect the personal and moral values and principles you want your children to follow. In addition, teens need to understand the possible consequences of being sexually active -- including pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases, as well as being emotionally hurt.

If I Talk to my Kids About Sex, Won't That Just Make Them Want to Do It?

It is important for children to understand sexual feelings and relationships before they become sexually active. In fact, studies have shown that teens who have discussed sex with their parents are more likely to wait longer to begin having sex and to use contraception.

What Should I Tell my Kids?

First of all, focus on the facts. Consider using the following list of topics as an outline:

• Explanation of anatomy and reproduction in males and females
• Sexual intercourse and pregnancy
• Fertility and birth control
• Other forms of sexual behavior, including oral sex, masturbation, and petting
• Sexual orientation, including heterosexuality, homosexuality, and bisexuality
• The physical and emotional aspects of sex, including the differences between males and females
• Self-image and peer pressure
• Sexually transmitted diseases
• Rape and date rape, including how being intoxicated (drunk or high), or accepting rides/going to private places with strangers or acquaintances puts you at risk
• How choice of clothing and the way you present yourself sends messages to others about your interest in sexual behavior

How Should I Talk to my Kids?

Some parents are uncomfortable talking to their kids about sex. It may help to practice what you are going to say before you sit down with your son or daughter. Be sure to pay attention and listen, as well. It may be helpful to have both parents present for support. Some teens may be embarrassed to talk about sex or to admit they don't know something, and so may not ask direct questions. Look for opportunities to bring up sexuality issues with your children. Opportunities may come from a scene on TV or in a movie, a book or article, or the appearance of visible changes in your son or daughter, such as the growth of breasts or facial hair. Explain the physical maturation process and the sexual arousal process. Remember to respect your child's privacy, and try to show that you trust him or her to make good decisions.

Teen Sexual Rights

When talking with your teen, consider the following teen sexual rights, which were developed by the Sexuality Information and Education Council of the United States (SIECUS):

• The right to accurate information about sexuality and HIV/AIDS
• The right to stop being physical or sexual with a partner at any point
• The right to say no to an unwanted touch of any kind
• The right to make decisions about sexuality, in your own time
• The right to express your sexuality safely, without risk of pregnancy, or STDs including HIV/AIDS
• The right not to be pressured into being physical or sexual
• The right not to express your sexuality unless you want to

Reviewed by the doctors at The Cleveland Clinic Department of Psychiatry and Psychology. Edited by Charlotte E. Grayson, MD, October 2003

Divinely Inspired Mutual Exclusivity

God says to Adam, "I have some good news and some bad news. What do you want to hear first?"

Adam says, "Tell me the good news first."

God says, "I'm going to give you a penis and a brain. You'll derive from these great pleasure and great intellect."

Adam replies, "Wonderful! But what's the bad news?"

God says, "I'm only going to give you enough blood supply to work one at a time."

Copyright 2003-2004 Azlan Adnan Legal Notice

By MARY DUENWALD
The Heart of the Matter

Blueberries, already known to help fight cancer and diabetes, may guard against heart disease as well, a new study suggests. The juicy little berries contain a compound called pterostilbene (pronounced ter-a-STILL-bean), which may have the potential to lower cholesterol as effectively as commercial drugs do.

Dr Agnes M. Rimando, a research chemist for the federal Department of Agriculture in Oxford, Missouri, who made the discovery, said she had suspected that the antioxidants in blueberries might help lower cholesterol. So she exposed chemicals found in blueberries to liver cells taken from rats. She found that pterostilbene activates a cell receptor that plays a role in lowering cholesterol and other blood fats.

The chemical's action is similar to that of ciprofibrate, a drug that lowers LDL cholesterol and triglycerides, which promote the development of plaques in the arteries, Dr Rimando said. If pterostilbene could be concentrated into pill form, it might be able to lower cholesterol as well as the drug but without the side effects of muscle pain and nausea that ciprofibrate causes in some people, she said.

Because the compound appears to be effective even in low concentrations, people might be able to get the cholesterol-lowering benefit simply by eating blueberries. But it is not yet known how many one would need to eat.

Copyright 2003-2004 Azlan Adnan Legal Notice

The Truth on US Torture Policy

'We Were Supposed to Humiliate Them'

By CAROLIN EMCKE,
Der Spiegel

nterview with US Staff Sergeant Ivan Frederick on torture at Baghdad's Abu Ghraib prison.

SPIEGEL: Since the images of torture at Abu Ghraib became public, you have had a lot of time, while detained in Baghdad, to think about your actions. Today, how do you view what you did - as a disgrace for America?

Frederick: I am very upset and depressed about what happened. I'm not a sadist. My family and my friends will attest to that. I was always proud to be defending America. In doing so, I made a lot of sacrifices in the past twenty years, especially since the attacks of September 11. I have always served my country well, even in Iraq - until we were transferred to Abu Ghraib and things got out of control.

SPIEGEL: What was the prison like when you arrived there in October 2003?

Frederick: As soon as I walked into that place the first time, I knew it was a nightmare. There was dirt everywhere, the toilets didn't work, and it stank. The food was terrible. The chicken wasn't cooked properly. It was still raw. We worked twelve hours a day, seven days a week. And we only had five soldiers for 1,000 prisoners. We had no place to unload our stress. Morale was generally miserable.

SPIEGEL: What kinds of guidelines applied to your job during the night shift? Who gave you your commands and instructions?

Frederick: I didn't even know who was really in charge. I knew that Captain Donald Reese was theoretically the company commander and that Brigadier General Janis Karpinski was in charge of all operations at Abu Ghraib. But in reality, the battalion wanted you to do one thing, while the company wanted you to do something completely different, and the intelligence services had their own ideas altogether. It was total chaos.

SPIEGEL: That's not an excuse for abusing prisoners.

Frederick: You're right, but on my very first tour, when they showed me cell block 1-A, I saw naked prisoners with their hands tied to the door. Sleep deprivation, withholding food, humiliating prisoners - those things were already routine at Abu Ghraib before I was transferred there.

SPIEGEL: You are also a prison guard in your civilian life, so that you're someone who should know about the proper treatment of prisoners. Why didn't you talk to your superiors about these practices?

Frederick: On the very first day, I asked a sergeant in military police company 372 why the prisoners were being treated that way. His answer was: That's the way the intelligence services do it. I heard a number of people say: "We don't waste a lot of time with them here. If they don't cooperate, we deal with them."

SPIEGEL: You keep talking about everyone else, but you did play along, after all. Who started the torture? Were you following orders, or did the situation simply escalate?

Frederick: Both. They would say: "Let the dogs loose on these prisoners! Try to get more information out of them. Take away their food, their clothing. Humiliate them!"

SPIEGEL: You stacked naked prisoners into a pyramid and abused them. Was that your idea, or were you also just following orders?

Frederick: There was a riot uprising at Abu Ghraib. A prisoner had injured a female American soldier in the face with a rock. They brought him and the other ones who were involved to our section, the "tough section," as a punishment. First we searched them. Then we made them undress and forced them to build that pyramid - and then everything got out of hand. One of the methods was to humiliate them, so that they would break down and talk, and I... I just wanted (he begins to cry) to humiliate them. And so I made them masturbate. I didn't want to commit a crime, I just wanted to humiliate them. But I am guilty of that.

SPIEGEL: Didn't you realize, at that moment, that what you were doing was wrong?

Frederick: I had mixed feelings at the time. Today I know I was wrong. On the one hand, I was filled with rage for this prisoner who had injured a female soldier. And they had told me to "humiliate them!" On the other hand, no one explained to us exactly how we were supposed to do that.

SPIEGEL: Why didn't you object? Didn't you have clear guidelines?

Frederick: I had guidelines at the prison in Buckingham, Virginia, where I worked as a civilian. But there were no guidelines at Abu Ghraib. No one gave me any instructions on the military principles for treatment of prisoners.

SPIEGEL: You could have invoked the Geneva Conventions.

Frederick: I didn't know anything about the Geneva Conventions. No one told me about them when I was in training. I just recently tried to find out about the Conventions on the internet. In addition, the intelligence people were constantly praising us. They would just say: "Keep up the good work."

SPIEGEL: Was that in reference to the abuse?

Frederick: The intelligence service simply imposed no limits. They wanted concrete results, and they didn't care how they were achieved.

SPIEGEL: What do expect from your trial?

Frederick: First of all, I want to apologize to the victims and their families. And I will take responsibility for my actions during the trial. But I also hope that others will follow my example and assume their share of the responsibility. It's clear that more people are responsible for what happened in Abu Ghraib, and many of them haven't even been charged yet.

Translated from the German by Christopher Sultan

A brief explanation of the science of stem cell research

Synopsis
A short article written in July 2002 giving a brief explanation of the science of stem cell research and the issues involved, written by Dr Muzammil (Imran) Siddiqi, a PhD in Genetics. The Islamic perspective on these issues is then examined. This article is from the Communications & Services section of IslamiCity, a US-based website covering community, social, educational, and religious issues, and also providing news coverage, business and finance information.

Let us first understand what is this research and what are the issues involved in it.
"The human body consists of many kinds of cells. These cells are very diverse in their structure and function. For example, neurons that make up the brain are very different from cells that make up our liver, cells that allow our heart to pump blood look nothing like the cells that make up our skin. In spite of their vast differences, however, all cells in the human body contain the same DNA. DNA provides the information, in the form of genes, which is necessary to make all these various cell types. Put simply, liver cells are liver cells because only a small set of genes are turned on in these cells while the rest are shut off. In the same way, cells in the brain or skin have their own set of genes activated, and other sets turned off. However, because all cells contain the entire set of DNA, they possess the information needed to make any kind of cell, though most of this information is not being used."

How do cells become specialized to form the different organs in the body?
"Human development begins when a sperm cell fuses with an egg cell. This initial fertilized egg, although it is only a single cell, is able to form an entire human being. This cell starts to divide into additional cells, which at this early stage are all able to produce a complete organism. These cells are therefore called totipotent, meaning they have total potential to produce all cell types present in a living human. As development proceeds and an embryo forms, these cells become pluripotent, meaning they have potential to become many different kinds of cells but can no longer give rise to a complete embryo. Later in development, through a process called cell differentiation, these pluripotent cells eventually give rise to the different and more specialized kinds of cells in the body and the different organs begin to form."

What are stem cells?
"Stem cells are cells that have not gone through the process of cell differentiation and therefore have the potential to give rise to many different kinds of specialized cells. For instance a stem cell could be used to produce liver cells, brain cells, heart muscle cells, blood cells, etc. The current sources of stem cells include embryos (which, as explained above, consist of pluripotent cells) and fetal tissue. In addition, some recent evidence suggests that even adults have a small number of mulitpotent cells that can be isolated and can later differentiate into various cell types."

"One source of stem cells is from embryos that were formed from a process called in vitro fertilization. This is a technique that has been used by doctors for some time, where eggs are removed from a woman after stimulation of the ovaries, and the isolated eggs are then fertilized by sperm cells in the laboratory. The fertilized eggs are allowed to divide for a few cycles and are then implanted into the woman's uterus, where a normal pregnancy can then take place. The purpose of this technique is to allow couples who cannot normally have children to be able to reproduce. The technique is not that efficient, however, and so doctors usually produce several embryos, hoping that at least one will be able to implant correctly in the uterus and start growing. The remaining embryos are either frozen for later use or are destroyed."

"Recently, scientists found that they can take these embryos at the stage before they are implanted into the uterus (within 1-5 days after fertilization), and remove pluripotent cells from them. These cells can then be grown and divided on dishes in the laboratory, and then theoretically used to produce all kinds of tissues, from liver cells to heart muscle cells to brain cells."

Why are stem cells important?
"Research on stem cells has much value both for scientific understanding of human development and for its potential to treat human disease. Many experiments on the effectiveness and safety of new drugs or treatments could be done on cell lines made from stem cells, instead of having to experiment on humans. In addition, stem cells might be used to produce liver cells that can then be formed into a functioning liver and transplanted into patients with liver failure. This would solve the current problem of organ shortage and could also solve the problem of immune rejection of organs. Stem cells might be used to create cells that produce insulin, which can then be transplanted into patients with type I diabetes. In short, stem cells have the potential to cure many diseases from liver disease, to diabetes, to Alzheimer's and Parkinson's disease, to heart disease, to spinal cord injury, and the list can go on and on."

"To make this potential of stem cells a reality, much research needs to be done in the next few years. To do this research, scientists need an ample supply of stem cells. Controversy arises because the main source stem cells are embryos used for in vitro fertilization. By removing cells from these embryos, scientists are essentially destroying the embryo, which could have otherwise gone on to develop into a child. However, as explained above, these embryos were developed initially in the laboratory solely for the sake of reproduction and, due to limitations of the in vitro fertilization technique, they were produced in excess of what was required for this purpose. As a result, the remaining embryos would have either been frozen indefinitely or destroyed. Perhaps if research was limited to using only these already existing embryos, it would be more acceptable than if embryos were created and destroyed specifically for the sake of acquiring stem cells."

Are there any other alternatives? What about stem cells from adults?
"Some research has shown that even adult humans have a small number of cells that are multipotent, meaning they have the potential to become several different types of specialized cells. The best example of this is cells from the bone marrow. These cells have long been known to be able to produce the different types of blood cells, from white blood cells to red blood cells to platelets involved in blood clotting."

"Just this past year, a group of researchers showed that some rare bone marrow cells can also be triggered to form fat, cartilage, bone, and muscle. Additional research can theoretically be done on ways to make these multipotent cells become pluripotent; in other words to somehow trigger these cells to go in reverse and become less specialized, and then allow them to differentiate into many kinds of cells. In spite of this interesting research on adult stem cells, it appears that stem cells derived from adults will not be as versatile as stem cells from embryos. Adult stem cells may not be able to provide cells for all kinds of tissues, and in addition they are difficult to isolate because they are so rare in the body. Thus, adult stem cells do not hold as much promise as do stem cells from embryos."

Now let us look at some of the moral issues involved in this research from an Islamic perspective.

Shari'ah Perspective on Stem Cells Research:
Married couples who cannot have pregnancy in a normal way are allowed to have in vitro fertilization as long as the fertilized ovum is placed in the womb of the woman from whom the egg the was taken (not a surrogate mother). The fertilization has to be with the sperm of her lawful husband during their married life, not after divorce or after the death of the husband. This is the general conclusion of various Muslim jurists' meetings that discussed this subject.

Having recognized that in vitro fertilization is permissible in Islam, now the first question that we should ask is that should an embryo, which is formed within a few days after an artificial fertilization and is not yet in the womb of its mother, be considered a human being, with all the rights of a human being?

According to the Shari'ah we should make a distinction between actual life and potential life. Also we should make a clear distinction between the fertilized ovum in the dish and the fertilized ovum in the womb of its mother. Indeed an embryo is valuable. It has the potential to grow into a human being, but it is not yet a human being. Similarly there is big difference in having something in a test tube or dish or something in the body of a human being. As mentioned above, these embryos were developed initially in the laboratory solely for the sake of reproduction and, due to limitations of the in vitro fertilization technique, they were produced in excess of what was required for this purpose. As a result, the remaining embryos would have either been frozen indefinitely or destroyed. If these embryos were treated as full human, it would have been forbidden to produce them in excess and to destroy them later. No one treats them as humans. Destroying such embryos is not called and cannot be called abortion. We disagree with the Catholic position that this is "equivalent to infanticide."

Muslim jurists have made a clear distinction between the early stages of pregnancy (first 40 days) and its later stages. It is mentioned that if someone attacks a pregnant woman and aborts her baby in the early stages of her pregnancy, that person's punishment will be less than that of the person who does that during full pregnancy. And if he kills the child after the birth, then he is liable to be punished for homicide.

The second question is whether according to the Shari'ah it is acceptable to destroy an embryo for the sake of research, even if this research can potentially cure many otherwise fatal diseases?

Our answer is that the embryo in this stage is not human. It is not in its natural environment, the womb. If it is not placed in the womb it will not survive and it will not become a human being. So there is nothing wrong in doing this research, especially if this research has a potential to cure diseases. However, it is important that we establish strict rules against the misuse of embryos. Research on embryos has the potential for misuse, for instance in regards to the donors of these cells, and we should anticipate what these misuses might be and establish safeguards against them. (For example, doctors might have infertility patient go through extra cycles of ovulation just so they can obtain more embryos, or they might pay women to produce embryos, or embryos might be obtained without the consent of the donors). In making rules, the authorities should also clarify that there is a difference between the use of "spare" embryos from in vitro fertilization procedures which would be destroyed regardless, as compared to the deliberate production of embryos for stem cell research. Each year, thousands of embryos are wasted in fertility clinics around the world. Such embryos should not be wasted, they should be used for research.

It is also good to encourage the research on the alternative: to use adult stem cells instead of embryonic or fetal stem cells. This would be much less controversial. However, it seems from the discussion of the experts in the field that adult stem cells are not nearly as useful as embryonic stem cells in their ability to differentiate into different cell types and would therefore not be as applicable in treating many diseases.

Until more research is done on this subject and Muslim scholars deliberate in detail on various aspects of this research, humbly following recommendations are in order:

1. It is claimed by the experts in the field that the research on stem cells has great potential to relieve human disease and suffering. If this is the case, then, it is not only allowed but it is obligatory (fard kifayah) to pursue this research.

2. The use of embryonic stem cells should be very heavily limited. Only allow isolation of stem cells from frozen embryos that were created for the purpose of in vitro fertilization and would otherwise have been destroyed. Obtain full consent from the donors. Provide safeguards against monetary compensation to embryo donors and against the creation of embryos in excess of what is required for in vitro fertilization.

3. Perhaps research using stem cells derived from adults will eventually prove to be most promising. We should encourage further research on the use of adult stem cells, to the point where it will be unnecessary to use embryos for this purpose. Specifically, we should find better ways to isolate existing stem cells in the human body.

Copyright 2003-2004 Azlan Adnan Legal Notice

This one is African

Hello ,

I am writting this letter with due respect and heartful of tears since we have not known or met ourselves previously I am asking for your assistance after I have gone through a profile that speaks good of you.
I want to find out if it's possible for you to deal with individual as to investment . I came across your profile and I feel it's highly reputable that is why I pick an interest getting across to you in respect of investment at my disposal .

I will so glad if you can allow me and lead me to the right channel towards your assistance to my situation now.I will make my proposal well known if I am given the opportunity. I would like to use this opportunity to introduce myself to you.

Well I am clementina from Liberia,the only daughter of Col sinko Dabor. My father is now late,he died some weeks back during the last and current crisis in my country(Liberia). He was one of the high officers in the leadership of formal president Charles Taylor who is now in exile after many innocent soul were killed ,My father was unlucky to be among those that was killed by the rebel.

The main reason why I am contacting you now is to seek you assistance in the area of my future investment and also for a help hand over some huge amount of money in my possession. This money (US6.5 Million)is deposited in a secuirty and finacier company in Europe some years ago by my father he made me the sole beneficiary .

I am now asking you to stand on my behalf to make this claim,to stand as my partner oversea and in time of the investment as well. As I have mention earlier I will make the procedure to this issue to bewell know to you,if I am given the opportunity to do so. contact me via my email adress (clementina_joy@epals.com) to enable us discuss Pls attach your direct and full information .

Miss Clementina


Another Box Con

From :
Mrs Charity Koromah
Abidjan, Cote d'Ivoire
West Africa.
Email: charitykoromah@yahoo.fr

Dear Sir,

With due respect to your humble self, I write you this letter which I believe you would be of great assistance to me and my children.

I am Mrs CHARITY KOROMAH, the wife of the late Dr DAVID KOROMAH of the blessed memory. Prior to my husband assassination by the rebel forces loyal to CORPORAL FODAY SANKOH of the Revolutionary United Front (RUF), He was the Director General National Gold and Diamond Mining Corporation of Sierra-Leone.

Few days before my husband was assassinated, he instructed me and my children ( DIDOW and HENRY ) to
move out of Sierra-Leone and also to go in his underground strong room where the documents of money he has deposited in a security company in Abidjan Cote d'Ivoire in one trunk Box as family valuables and treasures with the name of my first son DIDOW KOROMAH as the beneficiary. The amount is US$15,000.000.00 (Fifteen million United States Dollars.)We managed to escape to Abidjan the Republic
of Cote d'Ivoire through the help of my husband's friend who is a trawler. As our travelling document
was seized.

For your information , the security company does not know the real content of the box and we do not wish them to know until the money is transferred to your account. As it was deposited as family valuables and treasures.

Meanwhile, I want to leave Cote d'Ivoire entirely with this money for investment in your country because of the unstable political situation and mostly for the future of my children. I want you to please assist us to claim the box from the security company. we have it in mind to reward you with a certain percentage for your assistance. As soon as we hear from you.

Do not hesitate to send me e-mail immediately you receive this letter to enable us proceed in Ernest toward retrieving the box and transferring of the money into your account.

Finally, Please ensure that no one else knows about this money as it is only myself, my son, yourself knows about this money. Please even if you don't want to assist me, please don't expose this for my security.

May God bless you as you assist me. I am looking forward to hear from you as soon as possible.

Yours sincerely,
MRS CHARITY KOROMAH.
NB: please reply me through my private email address: charitykoromah@yahoo.fr

Copyright 2003-2004 Azlan Adnan Legal Notice

Another Filipina Scam

Urgent Attention:
villaran22@fastermail.com

Dear:

My name is Madam Villaran nenita. A complete citizen of the Philippines. My husband fell sick and he was flown to France for treatment but later died of ulcer and he has been buried.he died , who died on 15th of May 2002 I inherited a total sum of 12.3 million dollars from my late husband, this money which is concealed in a metallic trunk box is deposited with a security and finance company here in Philippine. Due to the instruction I laid down before I deposited the box, that I needed maximum security/safety of my consignment and no body nor government organization can trace the where about of the box until I am ready and prepare to claim it. for this reason the security company used their diplomatic means to send the box out of Philippines to Abidjan where they have their underground secrete vault. This deposit was coded under a secret arrangement as a family treasure. This means that the security company does not know the content of this trunk box that was sent from the Philippine to Abidjan under a diplomatic coverage for safe keeping.

My main purpose of sending you this mail is because of the way I found you and perhaps trustworthy to give you this priority of shipping the box of money to any address that you think is very secure and save in your country with your percentage of which we shall chat on soon.

In fact, since the death of my husband, his brothers has been seriously chasing me around with constant treats (sic), trying to suppress me so that they might have the documents of his landed properties and confiscate them. They have successfully collected all his properties, yet they never stopped there, they told me to surrender all bank account of my late husband, which I did, but I never disclose to them this deposit with the security company in Abidjan, because this is where my future and destiny lies upon.

The family secret existence of this deposit which I made with the security company and they can never be aware of it. Out of fear of my late husbands family, and when the situation becomes uncontrollable because of pressure on me from the Government of the Philippines, I decide to look for a trustworthy person who could assist me retrieve this box of money from the security company for onward lodgement into his account for the purpose of future investment. Consider my situation as a widow and come to my rescue.

There is need for urgent action because I'm paying $50 dollars per day as a demurrage to the security company for safe keeping this consignment. I will send you the Authorization Certificate to call them in my next mail which is the Certificate of deposit that they gave me on the very day when the box of money was deposited under their company.

I give thanks immensely for your co-operation as I look forward to hear from you soon.

Address your responds to my Private email address

villaran22@fastermail.com

for quick conclusion of this business.
All the best,
Madam Villaran nenita.

Copyright 2003-2004 Azlan Adnan Legal Notice

This one takes the cake

Laarni Enriquez is said to have moved to this house
in Wackwack when Estrada became Vice President.
(Click on the photo for a juicy bit of gossip.)

From: Laarni Enriquez
Subject: enjerika_18@yahoo.com.sg

Dear Sir,

I am madam Laarni Enriquez, a native of Philippine nationality, and a divorcee.

I would like to have a long lasting and confidant relationship with you and entrusting my life time fortune into your possession, as now I am broken hearted and needs someone to trust, without remembering my past and forsaken experiences from close confidants and family.


I need someone, who would take me for whom I am and as a life time partner, after making claims of my deposited life fortuned in Abroad.

Well, from your profile, I believe in me that you ought to be a very honest person. I would like to give you a brief description of my life.

I was once the mistress of our President, Joseph Estrada, and during his tenure in office, I was been used as a courier to depositing his funds, in the Europe, but due to the fracas I had with his wife, Madam Loi and her sone, Jude, it causes a public embarrasement and people came to know that I had been having an affair with the President.

But, not quite long, I was arrested, together with his wife and son, in connection with the 27th July, 2003, failed coup, which I did not have anything to do with, but was alleged of Rebellion charges and that I have been habouring some of the dissident and arms in one of the villa, bought for me by the President.

But, now, I have been released and I am under mmigration security watchlist and seriously monitored. All, I wanted from you is to assist me make claims of some funds, I did deposited in Europe and west Africa, as the other deposits documents have been consficated and seized by the the government of Madam Gloria, the President.

But, this one is the only one they could not see, as I did kept the documents with one of my close confidant, who was also arrested. The Amount being deposited is much about 10.2 million Euros, as this was the money that was supposed to be used by the President to aquire some properties in America, Europe and Africa.

All, I want from you, now is honesty and sincerity, as, as soon as this money is claimed by you, I will look for a way out and sneaked out of Philippines and travel down to meet you, so we can go into a life time partnership together,in investing this money in your country and anywhere else you prefer. I will send you my Photo, which I have with me and the Only one left. My private mail address is below, please do reply via it.

Sincerely yours,
Laarni Enriquez
enjerika_18@yahoo.com.sg

Copyright 2003-2004 Azlan Adnan Legal Notice

A man and his wife were having an argument about who should brew the coffee each morning. The wife said, "You should do it, because you get up first, and then we don't have to wait as long to get our coffee."

The husband said, "You are in charge of the cooking around here so you should do it, because that is your job, and I can just wait for my coffee."

Wife replies, "No, you should do it, and besides it says in the Bible that the man should do the coffee."

Husband replies, "I can't believe that! Show me."

So she fetched the Bible, and opened the New Testament and showed him at the top of several pages, that it indeed says, "HEBREWS."

Dear friends,

I've just heard from a good buddy that he got robbed last night. He had parked his car in the car park under the flyover and gone for a drink at the PJ Hilton. As he was returning to his car, he was ambushed by three Indonesians brandishing a large knife.

Left with no choice, the unfortunate dude gave up his wallet complete with his IC, driving license, credit cards and RM400 inside. He had the presence of mind to pretend to plead for RM50 as cabfare to go home in a bid to save his car from being taken. The robbers slashed his throat for his efforts.

Thank god they ran away after that and my friend managed to seek medical help. Luckily for him it turned out that the slash wound was not life-threatening. He's now recuperating at home.

So dear friends - we all know we live in dangerous times when criminals are desperate and, more importantly, completely merciless. Remember the recent case in Bahau where the 98-year-old grandma was slashed and beaten to death for a crummy RM10 and a pair of earrings?

Please do not take your safety for granted. And please do not think that you won't be attacked if you're a macho male. My friend was no wimp or wussy either, but he did the smart thing and lived to see another day.

After all, you can always find another RM400 and reapplying for your documents is a minor inconvenience at worst.

Please, please be careful and be aware of your surroundings and movements.

I really hate to be the bearer of bad news, but I'd hate it even more if inaction on my part resulted in someone getting hurt.

Right on the heels of one friend getting robbed and slashed recently, another friend tells me this incident happened to his brother, Deen, yesterday :

Deen walked across the parking lot at Bangsar, unlocked his car and got inside. He locked all the doors, started the engine and shifted into REVERSE, and looked into the rear-view mirror to back out of the parking space, only to find a newspaper stuck to the rear window, blocking his view. So, he shifted into PARK, left his engine running, unlocked his door and got out of his car to remove the paper obstructing his view.

When he reached the back of his car, the 2 car-jackers appeared as if out of nowhere, jumped into his car and took off, practically mowing him down as they sped off in his car.

Now comes the scary part - if you were a woman, you probably would have left your purse/handbag on the passenger seat of the car. You don't need me to remind you that it contains your identification, and you certainly do not want these guys getting your home address - they already have your keys! Not to mention your ATM cards, your handphone, and etc. BE AWARE OF THIS NEW SCHEME THAT IS NOW BEING USED.

Just drive away and remove the paper that is stuck to your window later, in a safe environment. Use your wing mirrors if necessary.

I normally do not encourage chain mail, but I do hope you will forward this to friends and family, especially to the women in your life.

From: Tkiiii

Share this info with your friends, family & relatives...

If you would like to know more about Personal Accident Insurance, Medical Insurance and Hospitalization Benefits, kindly contact Hema to make an appointment for one of our Financial Planning Consultants to visit you:

KL/Questar Agency
8.29, 8th Floor, Wisma AIG
99 Jalan Ampang
50450 KUALA LUMPUR
Tel: 03-2031 8128
Fax: 03-2032 1128
Web: www.questar-agency.com

A man placed some flowers on the grave of his dearly departed mother
and started back toward his car when his attention was diverted to
another man kneeling at a grave.

The man seemed to be praying with profound intensity and kept
repeating, "Why did you have to die? Why did you have to die? Why did
you have to die? Why did you have to die?"

The first man approached him and said, "Sir, I don't wish to interfere
with your private grief, but this demonstration of pain is more than
I've ever seen before. For whom do you mourn so deeply? A child? A
parent?"

The mourner took a moment to collect himself, then replied... "My
wife's first husband."

with many thanks to Nurzalena Zakaria for sharing this edifying piece
(see also companion piece Life of August 7, 2004)


Don't undermine your worth by comparing yourself with others,
It is because we are different that each of us is special...

Don't set your goals by what other people deem important,
Only you know what is best for you...

Don't take for granted the things closest to your heart,
Cling to them as they would your life, for without them, life is meaningless...

Don't let your life slip through your fingers by living in the past or for the future.
By living your life one day at a time, you live all the days of your life...

Don't give up when you still have something to give,
Nothing is really over until the moment you stop trying...

Don't be afraid to admit that you are less than perfect,
It is this fragile thread that binds us each together.

Don't be afraid to encounter risks,
It is by taking chances that we learn how to be brave.

Don't shut love out of your life by saying it's impossible to find.
The quickest way to receive love is to give;
The fastest way to lose love is to hold it too tightly;
And the best way to keep love is to give it wings...

Don't dismiss your dreams,
To be without dream is to be without hope;
To be without hope is to be without purpose.

Don't run through life so fast that you forget...
Not only where you've been, but also where you are going...

Life is not a race, but a journey to be savoured each step of the way...

Yesterday is History
Tomorrow is a Mystery
And Today is a Gift, the Present...

I speak to those who honour the Lord, and pray to Him
constantly, but cannot see Him.
Those who cleanse themselves of sin, will be richly rewarded.
To God all creatures will return.

~ Qu'ran, Fatir, Surah 35:18b

Sorry to bother you but I am hoping that you might be able to help me.
I found your e-mail address on a chain letter that was sent to me and
thought that as your name was on a chain letter you may have other chain
e-mail letters (forwards) that you could send to me?

I am doing a project at university regarding the different subjects
that go around the Internet on chain e-mail letters and how many people
they actually reach. I would be very grateful if you could send me any
that you have, absolutely anything and everything (even the rude ones).

We are trying to ascertain trends and patterns, also we know that
around 85% of all e-mails are Spam but what we don't know is what percentage
of that accounts for chain mail (forwards). I would also be very
grateful if you would be kind enough to forward this e-mail to all your
friends as I need as many as I can get my hands on for the project to be a
success.

This project is based over a year so please keep them coming. I will
let you know the results of my project and when to stop sending.

Please send all forwards to the following e-mail address - jane@ligne-net.info

Your help would very much be appreciated.

Thanks

Jane Rowlings
jane@ligne-net.info

To have your e-mail completely removed from my list, click the
following e-mail link and type remove in the subject line jane@ligne-net.info

Jane Rowlings
Middlesex University
Trent Park
Bramley Road
London
England
N14 4YZ

Free Credit Cards and Free Upgrades for those who Qualify

I'll be running Customer Service Roadshows in the following locations next week, signing up eligible applicants for free Motorist Club credit cards. Benefits include free petrol welcome gift when your card is approved, year-long discount whenever you buy petrol or diesel, 24-hour Auto Assist (all worth RM640 a year). I also do Credit Card Debt Restructuring.

To qualify, you need to have a credit card from any bank other than Standard Chartered Bank for more than one year. Please come prepared with photocopies of your:

1) IC (both sides)
2) present credit cards (both sides)
3) latest monthly statements of your present credit cards

If your present residential address is not the address on your IC, please bring a photocopy of a utility bill in your name with your current address on it.

PLEASE BRING THE ORIGINALS AS I HAVE TO SIGHT THEM BEFORE I CAN VERIFY THE PHOTOCOPIES.

ROADSHOW VENUES
Monday, August 23 2004 ~ 10 am to 3 pm
Kelana Jaya PUTRA LRT Station (concourse)
Kelana Jaya, PJ

Monday, August 23 2004 ~ 4 pm to 6 pm
AmInvestment Services Berhad
Bangsar Utama, KL

Monday, August 23 2004 ~ 6 pm to 8 pm
Wisma AIG and Menara AIA
99 Jalan Ampang, KL

Tuesday, August 24 2004 ~ 10.30 am to 12 noon
Faculty of Dentistry
University of Malaya

Tuesday, August 24 2004 ~ 12.30 pm to 3 pm
Pusat Kejiranan Precinct 16 (to be confirmed)
Putrajaya

Tuesday, August 24 2004 ~ 3.30 pm to 8 pm
Kelana Jaya PUTRA LRT Station (concourse)
Kelana Jaya, PJ

Wednesday, August 25 2004 ~ 10 am to 3 pm
Kelana Jaya PUTRA LRT Station (concourse)
Kelana Jaya, PJ

Wednesday, August 25 2004 ~ 4 pm to 5 pm
Wisma Denmark
86 Jalan Ampang, KL

Thursday, August 26 2004 ~ 11 am to 2 pm
Ministry of Health Kantin (next to Block A); and/or
Tanglin Hospital Kantin
Jalan Cenderasari, KL

Friday, August 26 2004 ~ 10 am to 3 pm
Central Bus Station
Cyberjaya

Friday, August 26 2004 ~ 5 pm to 8 pm
Menara AIA and Wisma AIG
99 Jalan Ampang, KL

--
Azlan
Mobile: 012-383 1324
Fax: 03-2032 1128
E-mail: azlan088@gmail.com
For more information on my Financial Planning and Other Services, click here.

Copyright 2003-2004 Azlan Adnan Legal Notice

From: www.bondmusic.net
Friday, August 20 2004

Bond are coming back to Asia in October!
We'll bring more details about venues as soon as we know them.

OCTOBER 2004
Fri 8 Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia
Sun 10 Hong Kong
Tues 12 Jakarta, Indonesia
Thurs 14 Singapore
Sat 16 Bangkok
Wed 20 Manila
Fri 22 Seoul, Korea
Sat 23 Pusan, Korea
Mon 25 Tokyo, Japan
Tues 26 Nagoya, Japan
Wed 27 Osaka, Japan
Fri 29 Kobe, Japan

for more information about the Japanese dates, go to the
Bond Japan site.

Azlan Adnan
Founder
Haylie Ecker Fan Club

Three women die together in an accident and go to heaven. When they
get there, St. Peter says, "We only have one rule here in heaven:
Don't step on the ducks!"

So they enter heaven, and sure enough, there are ducks all over the
place. It is almost impossible not to step on a duck, and although
they try their best to avoid them, the first woman accidentally steps
on one.

Along comes St. Peter with the ugliest man she ever saw. St. Peter
chains them together and says, "Your punishment for stepping on a duck
is to spend eternity chained to this ugly man!"

The next day, the second woman steps accidentally on a duck and along
comes St. Peter, who doesn't miss a thing. With him is another
extremely ugly man. He chains them together with the same admonishment
as for the first woman.

The third woman has observed all this and, not wanting to be chained
for all eternity to an ugly man, is very, VERY careful where she
steps. She manages to go for months without stepping on any duck, but
one day St. Peter comes up to her with the most handsome man she has
ever laid eyes on... very tall, long eyelashes, muscular, and thin.
St. Peter chains them together without saying a word.

The happy woman says, "I wonder what I did to deserve being chained to
you for all of eternity?"

The guy says, "I don't know about you, but I stepped on a duck!"

After a long life of unselfish service, Father John O'Malley died and
went to heaven. St. Peter met him at the gate and said: "John, you did
such a wonderful job for us on earth, we'd like to do something
special for you. You name it; it's yours."

John thought for a moment and said: "I'd like a private audience with
the Holy Mother." St. Peter told him it would be arranged.

On the appointed day, St. Peter escorted John to the Holy Mother's
sanctuary. John went before Her, knelt, and said: "Holy Mother, I've
always looked to You for guidance, and You have granted me peace and
serenity through some difficult times. But I have one question that
has nagged me during my whole time on earth. In all the paintings that
were done of you, and in all the sculptures that were carved of you,
you always looked so sad. Why is that?"

Mary thought for a moment, pursing her lips. She said: "I always wanted a girl."

A man in Topeka, Kansas decided to write a book about churches around
the country. He started by flying to San Francisco and worked east
from there. Going to a very large church, he began taking photographs
and notes.

He spotted a golden telephone on the vestibule wall and was intrigued
by a sign which read: "$10,000 a minute." Seeking out the Pastor he
asked about the phone and the sign. The Pastor explained that the
golden phone was, in fact, a direct line to Heaven and if he paid the
price he could talk directly to God. The man thanked the Pastor and
continued on his way.

As he continued to visit churches in Seattle, San Diego, Chicago,
Greensboro, Tampa and all around the United States, he found more
phones with the same sign and got the same answer from each Pastor.
Finally, he arrived in Texas. Upon entering a church in Dallas,
behold, he saw the usual golden telephone. But THIS time, the sign
read: "Calls: 35 cents." Fascinated, he asked to talk to the Pastor.

"Reverend, I have been in cities all across the country and in each
church I have found this golden telephone. I have been told it is a
direct line to Heaven and that I could talk to God, but, in the other
churches the cost was $10,000 a minute. Your sign reads 35 cents.
Why?"

The Pastor, smiling benignly, replied, "Son, you're in Texas now...
It's a local call."

A True Story by Suzana Mohamed Zahir

Please take note...

A reminder to hold the petrol nozzle at all times. You guys don't be lazy.

My friend stopped for petrol at the Projet Petrol Station (the one at
the Lingkaran Tengah Highway near Gombak) a little over two weeks
ago. This was the first time he patronized a Projet station.

As his normal practice elsewhere, he put the nozzle on automatic and
stood nearby waiting for his car to be filled up. Suddenly the nozzle
flew out of the gas tank opening with petrol spewing out at high
speed. He was sprayed with petrol all over, including his face and
eyes (just imagine the pain in his eyes). His companion quickly
brought him to the toilet to wash his face.

After that, they reported the incident to the staff and asked to speak
to the manager. The manager refused to see them; he only instructed
the staff to take my friend to the hospital. According to the staff
that was not the first time the nozzle came out of the tank while
customers are filling up petrol. But my friend's incident was the
worst. The top layer of his right eye was damaged and the area around
his eye burnt. His eye had to be bandaged for 10 days. He was lucky
that his eyesight was not affected.

Apparently the nozzle was lighter than normal and the speed of the
petrol created a backward thrust that pushed the nozzle out of the
tank. So please be careful. Share this info with your friends, family
& relatives...

If you would like to know more about Personal Accident Insurance, Medical Insurance and Hospitalization Benefits, kindly contact Hema to make an appointment for one of our Financial Planning Consultants to visit you:

KL/Questar Agency
8.29, 8th Floor, Wisma AIG
99 Jalan Ampang
50450 KUALA LUMPUR
Tel: 03-2031 8128
Fax: 03-2032 1128
Web: www.questar-agency.com

A heavy snowstorm closed the schools in a Scottish town. When the
children returned to school a few days later, one primary school
teacher asked her students whether they had used the time away from
school constructively.

"I sure did, teacher," one little girl replied, "I just prayed for more snow."

I'll be running the following Customer Service Roadshows next week, signing up eligible applicants for free Motorist Club credit cards. Benefits include free petrol welcome gift when your card is approved, year-long discount whenever you buy petrol or diesel, 24-hour Auto Assist (worth RM640 a year). I also do Credit Card Debt Restructuring.

ROADSHOW VENUES
Monday, August 16 2004 ~ 11 am to 2 pm
Ministry of Health Kantin (next to Block A)
Jalan Cenderasari, KL

Tuesday, August 17 2004 ~ 11 am to 2 pm
Menara AIA Food Court (LG floor)
99 Jalan Ampang, KL

Wednesday, August 18 2004 ~ 11 am to 2 pm
Klinik Dr Kader (to be confirmed)
Phileo Damansara, PJ

Wednesday, August 18 2004 ~ 3 pm to 5 pm
Klinik Zahida (to be confirmed)
SS1, Kampung Tunku, PJ

Thursday, August 19 2004 ~ 11 am to 2 pm
Ministry of Health Kantin (next to Block A)
Jalan Cenderasari, KL

Thursday, August 19 2004 ~ 3 pm to 6 pm
Menara AIA Food Court (LG floor)
99 Jalan Ampang, KL

Friday, August 20 2004 ~ 5 pm to 6 pm
Menara AIA Food Court (LG floor)
99 Jalan Ampang, KL

--
Azlan
Mobile: 012-383 1324
Fax: 03-2032 1128
E-mail: azlan088@gmail.com
For more information on my Financial Planning and Other Services, click here.

DORMITORY:
When you rearrange the letters:
DIRTY ROOM

PRESBYTERIAN:
When you rearrange the letters:
BEST IN PRAYER

DESPERATION:
When you rearrange the letters:
A ROPE ENDS IT

GEORGE BUSH:
When you rearrange the letters:
HE BUGS GORE

THE MORSE CODE:
When you rearrange the letters:
HERE COME DOTS

SLOT MACHINES:
When you rearrange the letters:
CASH LOST IN ME

ANIMOSITY:
When you rearrange the letters:
IS NO AMITY

MOTHER-IN-LAW:
When you rearrange the letters:
WOMAN HITLER

SNOOZE ALARMS:
When you rearrange the letters:
ALAS! NO MORE Z'S

A DECIMAL POINT:
When you rearrange the letters:
IM A DOT IN PLACE

THE EARTHQUAKES:
When you rearrange the letters:
THAT QUEER SHAKE

ELEVEN PLUS TWO:
When you rearrange the letters:
TWELVE PLUS ONE

AND FOR THE GRAND FINALE:

PRESIDENT CLINTON OF THE USA:
When you rearrange the letters
(With no letters left over and using each letter only once):
TO COPULATE HE FINDS INTERNS

Yep! Someone with waaaaaaaaaaay
too much time on their hands!

Bet your friends haven't seen this one!!!
DON'T FORGET TO SHARE THIS

AL-QAYYUM, AL-MAJID, AL-WAJID, AL-WAHID,
AL-AHAD, AL-SAMAD,
AL-QADIR

SEBARKAN KETUJUH NAMA ALLAH INI PADA TUJUH ORANG INSYAALAH KEINGINANMU
AKAN TERCAPAI.

Author: Unknown
(Sung to the tune of London Bridge is Falling Down


Kepong Bridge is falling down,
Falling down, falling down.
Kepong Bridge is falling down,
My fair Samy.

Take a gag and shut us up,
Shut us up, shut us up.
Take a gag and shut us up,
My fair Samy.

How will we build it up,
Build it up, build it up?
How will we build it up again,
My fair Samy?

Build it up with tax and toll,
Tax and toll, tax and toll.
Build it up with tax and toll,
My fair Samy.

Roads and bridges bend and break,
Bend and break, bend and break.
Roads and bridges bend and break,
My fair Samy.

Blame it on an Act of God,
Act of God, Act of God.
Blame it on an Act of God,
My fair Samy.

Rocks and blames will wash away,
Wash away, wash away.
Rocks and blames will wash away,
My fair Samy.

Six Patterns for Weight Loss Management
Researchers Say Certain Habits Can Maintain Weight Loss Efforts

Owning a pet can ward off depression, lower blood pressure, and boost immunity. It may even improve your social life.

Men and women are hard-wired for short-term sex -- but must we obey our brains?

Preacher: "How come I never see you in church anymore, Morris?"

Morris: "There are too many hypocrites there, Reverend."

Preacher: "Don't worry, Morris; there's always room for one more."

My kids are selling superior quality imported BEIFA gel ink pens to make some extra pocket money. These gel ink pens are the latest craze because the writing is so smooth. The ink is imported from Germany and is sunlight and water resistant. The tip is imported from Switzerland. The design is from the USA.

Prices:
$3.99 each
Volume Discounts:
3 for $10
5 for $15
7 for $20
10 for $25
a box of 12 for $30
Free delivery for all orders above $100

Technical Specifications:
~ 0.5 mm ball with ultrafine line
~ tip is imported from Switzerland
~ gel ink imported from Germany
~ available in blue and black only
~ sunlight and water resistant
~ conforms to ASTM D-4236, EN-71 and ISO 9002

To Order:
Call 012-383 1324
Fax: 03-2095 5652
E-mail: azlan088@gmail.com
Web: http://azlanadnan.blogspot.com/2004/08/imported-pens.html

Author: Unknown
With many thanks to Suzana Mohamed Zahir for sharing this edifying piece with us

There was a man who had four sons. He wanted his sons to learn not to judge things too quickly. So he sent them each on a quest, in turn, to go and look at a pear tree that was a great distance away. The first son went in the winter, the second in the spring, the third in summer, and the youngest son in the fall.

When they had all gone and come back, he called them together to describe what they had seen.

The first son said that the tree was ugly, bent, and twisted. The second son said no-it was covered with green buds and full of promise. The third son disagreed, he said it was laden with blossoms that smelled so sweet and looked so beautiful, it was the most graceful thing he had ever seen. The last son disagreed with all of them; he said it was ripe and drooping with fruit, full of life and fulfillment.

The man then explained to his sons that they were all right, because they had each seen but only ONE season in the tree's life. He told them that you cannot judge a tree, or a person, by only one season, and that the essence of who they are - and the pleasure, joy, and love that come from that life -- can only be measured at the end, when all the seasons are up.

If you give up when it's winter, you will miss the promise of your spring, the beauty of your summer, fulfillment of your fall. Don't let the pain of one season destroy the joy of all the rest.

Don't judge life by one difficult season. Persevere through the difficult patches and better times are sure to come some time later.

"Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take,
but by the moments that take our breath away."

A Good Warning to Us All
by Suzana Mohamed Zahir

Especially those of you who use the plug-in "Ambi Pur" or "Glade" air
freshners. My brother and his wife learned a hard lesson this last
week. Their house burned down... nothing left but ashes.

They have good insurance, so the home will be replaced and so will
most of the contents. That is the good news. However, they were sick
when they found out the cause of the fire.

The insurance investigator sifted through the ashes for several hours.
He had the cause of the fire traced to the master bathroom. He asked
my sister-in-law what she had plugged in the bathroom. She listed the
normal things... curling iron, blow dryer. He kept saying to her, "No,
this would be something that would disintegrate at high temperatures."

Then, my sister-in-law remembered she had a Glade Plug-in in the
bathroom. The investigator had one of those "Aha" moments. He said
that was the cause of the fire. He said he has seen more home fires
started with the plug in type room fresheners than anything else.

He said the plastic they are made from is a THIN plastic. He said in
every case there was nothing left to prove that it even existed. When
the investigator looked in the wall plug, the two prongs left from the
plug-in were still in there.

My sister-in-law had one of the plug-ins that had a small night light
built in it. She said she had noticed that the light would dim... and
then finally go out. She would walk in a few hours later, and the
light would be back on again.

The investigator said that the unit was getting too hot, and would dim
and go out rather than just blow the light bulb. Once it cooled down,
it would come back on. That is a warning sign. The investigator said
he personally wouldn't have any type of plug in fragrance device
anywhere in his house.

He has seen too many burned down homes.

P.S. If you require home insurance to protect your home and loved ones
from fire, please contact:

KL/Questar Agency
8.29, 8th Floor, Wisma AIG
99 Jalan Ampang
50450 KUALA LUMPUR
Tel: 03-2031 8128
Fax: 03-2032 1128
Web: www.questar-agency.com

A detoxification process using electrolysis and ex-osmosis

There are a number of propriety aqueous detoxification systems out there, including:

Aqua Detox International
Hydra Detox International
Detox Systems "Baby-D" Foot Spa

The Bio-Energy Clinic has tested Bio/Ionic-Detox, Aqua-Detox, Platinum Detox(TM) and The Detox Box machines.

---

Exporting excellence

August 4 2004

By Evening Gazette

The North-east's top exporters have been unveiled at a prestigious awards ceremony organised by the North East Chamber of Commerce and sponsored by HSBC and the Port of Tyne.

The annual North East Export Awards, which this year celebrates the 10th anniversary of the Lloyds TSB Award for Export Achievement, were presented at a special Exporters' Dinner at Durham's Ramside Hall Hotel.

Three companies were recognised for their exporting achievements with others highly commended by the judging panel.

Mandy Bainbridge, of Colliewobbles, scooped the UK Trade & Investment New Exporter Award, which celebrates the work of an individual new to exporting. The company was also awarded funding from Defra's Rural Enterprise Scheme to expand the business to include a range of sheepdog and agility courses at the farm.

Highly commended in the New Exporter Award category was Graham Borthwick, of Platinum Detox Ltd, which offers a novel detoxification process for the human body through the soles of the feet.

Adrian Teasdale, of Inovica Ltd, was presented with the NECC Innovation in Export Award, awarded to an individual engaged in export trade who can demonstrate added value to their company through innovation, for example, product design, management systems, logistics, innovative technology, and etc.

Peter Johnson, of Techtonik Ltd, scored a double in the awards being highly commended in the Innovation in Export category and winning the Lloyds TSB Achievement Award, which recognises outstanding achievement in export by an individual.

Highly commended in the Achievement Award category was Darren Jobling, of Eutechnyx Limited, one of the UK's leading video games developers with titles including Big Mutha Truckers, which was last year nominated for a BAFTA Games Award.

Each award winner was presented with a trophy and prize money of £500.

---

Techtonik lead way on big export awards night

July 9 2004

By Graeme King, The Journal

The region's top exporting companies were recognised for their achievements last night at the glittering North-East Export Awards dinner.

The black tie Exporters Dinner held at the Ramside Hall Hotel, near Durham, brought all the region's jet-setting businesses together to reminisce over a year of achievement and look forward to even greater success in the future.

John Williams, UK Trade and Investment's international trade director, said: "These annual awards are a wonderful opportunity to celebrate the exporting achievements of the North-East.

"Last year the region's exports topped £10bn and we are one of only three regions across the country with a positive trade balance." One of the big winners on the night was Peter Johnson from software company Techtonik. He won the Lloyds TSB Achievement in Export award, and was also highly commended in the Innovation in Export category. Sunderland-based Techtonik has seen a staggering increase in turnover in recent years, from £750,000 to more than £30m.

Darren Jobling, of video game developer Eutechnyx, was highly commended for the Achievement in Export Award, which was being sponsored by Lloyds TSB for the 10th consecutive year.

The winner of the Innovation in Export Award, sponsored by the North-East Chamber of Commerce, was Adrian Teasdale, of Newcastle-based IT company Inovica. He was honoured for his role in creating a new encryption programme to protect websites from information and image theft. The programme has been sold to more than 50 countries in the past year.

The UKTI New Exporter Award was won by entrepreneur Mandy Bainbridge, who runs gift company Colliewobbles with her husband Marcus. The couple offer a range of gifts for owners of Border Collies and other dogs through their mail order business which operates via their www.colliewobbles.com website. They run the business from their farm at Egglestone, near Barnard Castle, to provide a second income beyond farming.

Graham Borthwick, of detoxification company Platinum Detox in South Shields, was highly commended in the same category (UKTI New Exporter Award).

Brendan Murphy, director of international trade at the North East Chamber of Commerce, said: "This event serves as a reminder to all regional businesses not yet engaged in exporting to contact the business support network for a range of international trade services."

Copyright 2003-2004 Azlan Adnan Legal Notice

Paki Matrimonial Website: www.mehndi.com

United Press International, Los Angeles ~ Islamic devotion and Internet dating are emerging as dual signatures of some Pakistani communities where matchmaking has long been a family affair.

One of the most successful symbols of that is www.mehndi.com, a "matrimonial" website tailored to traditional Pakistanis, the Los Angeles Times reported.

Founded in March 2004 by Mehndi Bokhari, a Pakistani who lives in Canada, the site features numerous personals posted by eligible Muslim young people -- and their parents. By pursuing the process together, families retain Islam's traditional parental oversight of the matchmaking process, he said.

Mehndi, however, is not the only such service. Take "Shaadi Online," where producers interview the parents of a "candidate" as well as the bachelor or bachelorette, and the explicit goal is marriage.

The show already airs in the Persian Gulf state of Dubai, home to a sizable Pakistani community.

Shaadi Online producers are developing a searchable online database of marriage candidates and plan to launch the program via satellite in the United States soon.

Copyright 2004 by United Press International.

How To Forgive--Totally

When a trusted person has betrayed us, or brought us to tears and brokenness, how can we truly forgive?

Excerpted from The Total Forgiveness Experience: A Study Guide to Repairing Relationships by R.T. Kendall.

Since forgiveness is a choice, what is the next step? If we are persuaded that it is right and have decided to do it (and not look back), what next?

1. Make the deliberate and irrevocable choice not to tell anyone what they did.
You may need to do this for therapeutic reasons, but only to one person who in turn will never reveal your heart. Otherwise, do not mention it; refuse to tell anybody.

This isn't necessarily easy sometimes, but when our motive is to hurt another person by telling on them, there is sin on our part. So do not tell it at all or in part; keep it quiet.

2. Be pleasant to them should you be around them.
Do not say or do anything that would make them anxious. Put them at ease.

3. If conversation ensues, say that which would set them free from guilt.
Guilt is most painful, and we can easily punish people by sending them on a "guilt trip." Never do that. Remember that Jesus doesn't want us to feel guilty. When we are going to be Jesus to another, then we will not want them to be angry with themselves. "Do to others as you would have them do to you" (Luke 6:31).

4. Let them feel good about themselves.
Not only does this mean never reminding them of their wrong and your hurt, but it also means helping them through any guilt they may have. You must behave as though you don't even think they did anything wrong! That is hard for all of us, but it must be done. Say whatever you can (as long as it is true) that will give that person a sense of dignity. That is the point of Galatians 6:1: "Brothers, if someone is caught in a sin, you who are spiritual should restore him gently. But watch yourself, or you also may be tempted." As long as there is a trace of self-righteousness and pointing the finger, your attempt at total forgiveness will backfire.

5. Protect them from their greatest fear.
If you are aware of some deep, dark secret and fear they have, they will probably know that you know. If they can tell by your graciousness that their secret will never be revealed--ever--to anyone, they will be relieved. You only tell them when you know they know what you know, and you are convinced this would make them feel better. If by reminding them it would obviously not make them feel better, don't even come close!

6. Keep it up today, tomorrow, this year, and next.
Total forgiveness is a lifelong commitment. Some days will be easier than others. There will come a time when you think you are completely over it and have won a total victory-only to find the very next day Satan reminds you of what they did and the utter injustice that they will be unpunished and never exposed. The temptation to bitterness will emerge. After all, we're not perfect! If we say we have no sin-that we are incapable of the same old bitterness-we are deceived (1 John 1:8).

This is exactly why I read Luke 6:3 7 every day: "Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven." All commitments to forgive need renewal. In my case, daily. I am not telling you that this is what you must do, but be warned: the devil is cunning. He will come through the back door unexpectedly and try to upset you for forgiving. When you forgave your enemy, you then and there removed that open invitation to the devil to get inside. Satan's favorite rationale is bitterness-he therefore will keep trying to get back into your thought life.

Whether it be Luke 6:37 or another way forward in your case-even if you aren't required to keep it up each day-I can tell you right now that it is only a matter of time before your commitment to forgive will need to be renewed.

7. Pray for them.
"But I tell you: Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you" (Matt. 5:44). When you do this from the heart, praying for their being blessed and off the hook, you're there. It is not a perfunctory prayer, not a "We commit them to You" prayer, and certainly not a "O God, please deal with them" prayer. It is praying that God will forgive them-that is, overlook what they have done and bless and prosper them as though they'd never sinned at all. I remember a church leader turning to me to pray about his son-in-law who had been unfaithful to the leader's daughter. He said to me that his own prayer was only this: that God would "deal" with this man. "This is where I have come to," he said to me, "that God will deal with him."

I understood what he meant, and I felt for him. I find what people do to our own offspring are the hardest things to forgive. I therefore understood what he was feeling. A few days later it was reported that this leader's son-in-law had been in a serious accident. This same church leader was on the phone, glad that the accident had happened. Now in this particular case there was nothing sinister in this euphoria. He simply hoped that the accident would wake up his son-in-law to put his marriage back together. It was so understandable.

But this is not what Jesus means. He is commanding us to pray that our enemy will be blessed. If, however, you should pray that they will be cursed or punished instead of being blessed, just remember that is how your enemy possibly feels about you. After all, have you ever been someone's enemy? Have you ever done something that brought a fellow Christian to tears and brokenness? If so, how would you like that person to pray for you? That God will deal with you? That God will cause you to have an accident? Yet how would it make you feel if they prayed that you would be blessed and let off the hook? That you would prosper as if you'd never sinned? Would you not like that? "Do to others as you would have them do to you" (Luke 6:31).

Jesus wants a sincere prayer from us. It is like signing your name to a document, having it witnessed, and never looking back. You are not allowed to tell the world, "Guess what I did? I have actually prayed for my unfaithful spouse to be blessed." No. It is quiet. Only the angels witness it, but it makes God very happy.

After all, every parent wants their children to get along with one another. No parent likes it when one child comes and squeals on the other and demands that they be punished. The poor parent is put on the spot. What gladdens the heart of every parent is when there is love and forgiveness. That is what we do for God when we ask that He bless and not curse. He told us to pray for our enemies, "that you may be sons of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteousness" (Matt. 5:45).

THE FIVE STAGES IN PRAYING FOR OUR ENEMIES
There are five stages, or levels, of praying for one's enemy:

1) DUTY. The first level is strictly based on obedience; you are doing it because you feel you have to.

2) DEBT. You have reached the second level when you are so conscious of what you have been forgiven of that you cannot help but pray for your enemy. You don't want God to "spill the beans" on you, so you pray that your enemy too will be spared.

3) DESIRE. You begin to pray for your enemy because it is what you really want.

4) DELIGHT. This takes desire a step further. It is when you love doing it! You get joy from praying for and blessing your enemies.

5) DURABILITY. This means that what you took on as a lifelong commitment becomes a lifestyle. The thought of turning back or praying in a different way becomes out of the question. What began as a duty and once seemed insurmountable is now almost second nature.

Copyright 2004. Reprinted from The Total Forgiveness Experience: A Study Guide to Repairing Relationships.

A Christian, a Muslim and a Buddhist die and arrive at the Gate of
Heaven. An angel (or dewa) stops them and asks, "Why do you come here?
Can you tell me the reasons why you should be allowed to enter
Heaven?"

The Christian replies, "My ancestors disobeyed God, and I sinned all
my life: I killed, I lied, I cheated my wife and I was greedy.
However, Jesus died for me and all my sins are forgiven. So I deserve
to enter Heaven."

"OK," replies the Angel, "sounds good, but I must give you an entrance
examination before you can enter."

The Christian promptly agrees and the Angel asks him: "How do you spell God?"

It is an easy question, and the Christian passes through the Gate.

Next came the Muslim, who says, "I did not do any especially good or
evil things during my life but I was very devout. I prayed to God five
times a day. So, I too should enter Heaven."

The Angel replies, "It sounds OK to me, but I have to give you a test
also. How do you spell Allah?"

The Muslim passes the test and enters Heaven.

Finally, it is the Buddhist's turn. He tells the Angel, "I've done all
the good things in my life and I followed Buddha's five precepts: I
never killed, I donated to charities, I meditated every day, and I
never cheated my boss nor my customers."

The Angel replies, "That is very good, but there are no exceptions.
You must pass the entrance test also in order to get in."

Thinking that the test should be simple, the Buddhist happily agrees.

The Angel then asks him: "How do you spell Avalokitesvara Bodhisattva?"

Such is God, your Lord. There is no god but Him. He is the creator of
all things; therefore serve Him.

He is the protector of all things. No mortal eyes can see Him, though
He sees all eyes. He is aware of all subtleties; He knows all.

A letter written in a childish scrawl came to the post office addressed to "God". A postal employee, not knowing exactly what to do with the letter, opened it and read:

"Dear God, my name is Jimmy. I am 6 years old. My father is dead and my Mom is having a hard time raising me and my sister. Would you please send us $500?"

The postal employee was touched. He showed the letter to his fellow workers and all decided to kick in a few dollars each and send it to the family. They were able to raise $300. A couple of weeks later the same post office received a second letter addressed to God. The boy thanked God for the recent infusion of cash, but ended with this request:

"Next time would you send the money directly to us? If you send it through the post office they deduct $200."

Because Men Deny Risk, STD Prevention is Low Priority

Many low-income, straight men don't use condoms for disease prevention, despite knowing the risks, a new study shows.

Rather than wear a condom to prevent syphilis, gonorrhea, or other sexually transmitted diseases (STDs), they would rather take a chance -- and deal with the consequences later, researcher Diane M. Grimley, PhD, chair of the Department of Health Behavior at the University of Alabama at Birmingham.

Her paper appears in the January 2004 issue of the American Journal of Health Behavior.

Public health warnings regarding STD prevention have made some impact, she notes. Rates of syphilis and gonorrhea are at a 50-year low. However, there's still a big problem -- rates of syphilis, gonorrhea, and chlamydia remain far higher in the U.S. than in other industrialized nations, writes Grimley.

Her concern focuses specifically on sexually active men who have multiple partners and/or overlapping relationships. She explains that infected men can readily infect a woman only after one sexual encounter. Typically STD prevention programs target women and this lack of emphasis on heterosexual men is troublesome given their contribution to continuing STD transmission, she writes.

How Safe Are You?
In their study, Grimley and her colleagues focused on 224 men -- all with STD symptoms -- who sought treatment in a Birmingham STD clinic. The average age was 26, and most men were black.

In face-to-face, private interviews, each was asked the same set of questions

Among them:
1) How often have you used a condom in the past month?
2) How long have you been using condoms?
3) Do you have any intention of starting condom use?
4) Why do you use condoms?
5) Do you wear condoms for STD prevention or to protect your partner from pregnancy and disease?
6) Why don't you use condoms?

And the results:
1) 80% reported that most people their age did not use condoms consistently. They also said that 61% of people their age had gonorrhea.
2) 81% acknowledged sexual contact with two or more partners during the preceding six months.
3) 45% reported sexual relationships that overlapped.
4) 65% said they had been diagnosed with one or more STDs in the past.

Despite strong beliefs that condoms could be effective in STD prevention, many men were not motivated to use condoms consistently, Grimley reports.

Of those men with one main sexual partner, two-thirds were not motivated to use condoms.

These men also gave little indication they would start using condoms for STD prevention, she explains.

"They wanted their partners to know that they were committed to the relationship," she writes. Other studies show similar attitudes, indicating that intimate relationship issues are important to many men, as well as women, she says.

Safety is Often Not a Concern
Also, alcohol and drug users gave the least indication they would use condoms.

For many men, safety from disease does not play a central role in their decision-making about condoms, writes Grimley.

"These men do perceive themselves at high risk for STDs, but appear to cope with this risk" by getting treatment once they've got symptoms -- rather than preventing it with condoms, she writes.

Other researchers have found, too, that low-income minority men "calculate their risk and take actions based on what they have learned through their own observations and experiences," writes Grimley.

This study provides "an important window into condom use in a population that is potentially at risk," says Gail Wyatt PhD, associate director of the AIDS Institute at the UCLA School of Medicine. She is also author of the book, No More Clueless Sex: 10 Secrets to a Sex Life That Works for Both of You.

However, "you have be careful not to generalize this to other African-American men," Wyatt tells WebMD. In the South, and especially in Alabama, low-income men generally distrust medical researchers -- which could have affected the answers they gave, she says.

"It's important to look at ethnic minorities individually, to take time to understand the issues for each group," Wyatt says. "We know that health services utilization in the South, among poor people, is not the same as for people with jobs and health insurance."

Nonetheless, she says, "a number of studies involving ethnic minority men have shown that heterosexual men don't feel they need to use condoms. Even if they hear the message [to use condoms for STD prevention], they don't want to hear it."

---

SOURCES:
Grimley, D. American Journal of Health Behavior, January 2004; vol 28: pp 33-42.
Gail Wyatt PhD, associate director, AIDS Institute at the UCLA School of Medicine, and author of No More Clueless Sex: 10 Secrets to a Sex Life That Works for Both of You.

Copyright 2003-2004 Azlan Adnan Legal Notice

Guiding or Forgotten Principles?
By Melati Mohd Ariff

KUALA LUMPUR, Aug 4 (Bernama) -- Come August 31, Rukunegara would be 34 years old and based on its history the five principles should have been our way of life and not treated as only a pledge, to be occasionally read, fullstop.

Proclaimed on Merdeka Day 1970 by the fourth Yang di-Pertuan Agong, the Rukunegara was formulated after the nation was rocked with the racial riot of May 13, 1969. It was to bind and unify the people of Malaysia who at that time still harboured a deep sense of racism and racial prejudice.

It was also to be used as a guidance in the formation of one Nation regardless of race and religion.

Rukunegara consists of two parts: The first envisions the kind of society desired as stated in the following pledge:

"Our Nation, MALAYSIA, being dedicated - to achieving a greater unity of all her peoples; to maintaining a democratic way of life; to creating a just society in which the wealth of the nation shall be equitably shared; to ensuring a liberal approach to her rich and diverse cultural traditions; to building a progressive society which shall be oriented to modern science and technology."

The second part outlined the five principles - Belief in God; Loyalty to the King and Country; Supremacy of the Constitution; Sovereignty of the Law and Good Behaviour and Morality -- embodying all the high values to mould a Malaysian society that is free from vengeance, envy and prejudice.

RUKUNEGARA ADVICE
Recently Malaysians are advised to "go back and appreciate the principles of Rukunegara in their every day lives to strengthen nation-building." The call was made by Tan Sri Ghazali Shafie, one of the architects of the Rukunegara who had once held the post of Information Minister, Home Minister and Foreign Minister.

The Principles of Rukunegara, he said, "must be used as a benchmark in implementing various projects and jobs. This include all politicians, lawyers and civil servants."

According to him, "the failure to practise the principles of Rukunegara has impacted many projects including corruption."

Ghazali had probably made the statement after "a lengthy observation" based on his broad experience in and outside the government. He probably did not like what he saw happening in the Malaysian society of today.

What is certain is that his call should be heeded and the Rukunegara should be re-emphasized, especially among the younger generations, so said several leaders including religious leaders when contacted by Bernama.

Malaysian Umno Youth Movement Exco, Datuk Firdaus Ismail said the call made by Ghazali is timely in view of the current situation.

LIVE UP THE SPIRIT
"Many Malaysians, especially the younger generations don't appreciate the principles of Rukunegara. There are even those who cannot remember them. I once asked some primary school children and they told me they couldn't remember.

"Look also at our youngsters, the way they dressed. They have more regard for foreign culture than their own. I worry that in the end the Rukunegara will no longer be regarded as something that is noble. Malaysians should take pride in Rukunegara as Indonesians do with their Panca Sila," said Firdaus, who is also a former Imam of Masjid Negara.

He said what is needed is to find a mechanism to revive the spirit of appreciating the principles of Rukunegara.

To that effect, he called for the civics subject to be re-introduced in primary and secondary schools that would emphasize on statehood, the principles of Rukunegara and its interpretation.

"When I was in school, I learnt alot on the principles of Rukunegara through civics. Now they don't teach civics anymore. I like to call for this subject to be revived.

KNOW THE INTERPRETATION OF EACH PRINCIPLE
"Equally important is the interpretation of each principle. The first principle, for example, Belief in God. If we were to hold to this principle, our moral will be taken care of. This principle is for all religions and beliefs. We should respect all religions. We must have tolerance and if we are to appreciate this, hatred of other religions will not arise," he explained.

Firdaus said civics will also teach the younger generation not only to love their country but also to respect their leaders.

"Now we can see the signs of disrespect and some even don't know who is the head of state, who are their leaders," he added.

Understanding the principles is also as important as understanding the objective of the Rukunegara, namely, to create a just, unified, liberal and democratic society.

According to the President of International Movement for a Just World (JUST) Dr Chandra Muzaffar, Malaysians also need to look at the overall history of Rukunegara and its relation with two other important documents, namely, the National Constitution and Vision 2020 which are important processes in our history respectively.

"Our Constitution was made in 1957 as the framework for the country's concept taking into consideration the history, the current situation and the society's need as the basis for our country. After May 13, 1969, we realised that we need a document that would outline with more precision and detailed the future of our country besides adding and strengthening the existing Constitution," explained Dr. Chandra.

VISION 2020
He said Vision 2020 that was introduced in 1991 explained in detail "certain aspects of Rukunegara so as to give an overall picture on the country's noble aspirations."

Even though Rukunegara is still being recited at primary and secondary's school assemblies, Dr. Chandra said "reciting without understanding its purpose and objective will not have any meaning for the society. We should practise them. Practice becomes a problem due to weakness in the monitoring system."

He also questioned whether any effort is made to ensure students understand the purpose and objective of the Rukunegara that they are reciting.

"Take for example 'Good Behaviour and Morality'. In this case, our students should possess good ethical values that are also included in Vision 2020. There is a link but do teachers and parents really monitor their behaviour and who do they associate with or show healthy examples to the younger generation?" asked Dr. Chandra.

He however said it is still not too late to make amend and at the same time there is also a need for a change in mindset involving all including leaders, religious groups, influential people and parents themselves.

RELIGIOUS PERSPECTIVE
President of the Sasana Abhiwurdhi Wardhana Society, Sarath W. Surendre, said based on what is happening today including crimes which are alarming, Malaysians should go back to the principles of Rukunegara and adhere to the teachings of their religions.

He hoped that the government would not concentrate in its efforts to instill Islamic values only amongst the Muslims of this country. "The government is actively explaining to the Muslims on the concept of Islam Hadari. I hope the government would also make the same effort in the application of values of other religions," he added.

Sarath who is also a teacher for the past 30 years said school children do not appreciate the principles of Rukunegara and at the same time they do not have a sense of belonging to their schools.

"There's something missing here. They no longer have a sense of belonging," said Sarath who is also the honorary treasurer of the Malaysian Consultative Council of Buddhism, Christianity, Hinduism and Sikhism.

He said there is a need for a study to identify the causes of problems like polarisation in schools. Or why the close relation between the races is losing its warmth.

SCHOOLS AND INSTITUTIONS OF LEARNING
President of the Malaysian Hindu Sanggam, Datuk A. Vaitilingam, said what is required now is to give emphasis to the importance of Rukunegara not only in schools but also other institutions of learning as it is lacking now.

He said what need to be emphasized include respect for the law. "Nowadays there are certain members of the younger generation who don't seem to respect the rule of law and order. The government needs to come out and stress on civic mindedness and responsibilities, for example, in public places.

"Even though they can be fined, there are some who openly flout the law. Therefore, monitoring and enforcement must be stressed," he added.

On racial unity, he said it is of utmost important for all to understand that all religions possess good values.

General-Secretary of the Council of Churches in Malaysia (CCM), Rev. Dr. Hermen P. Shastri, said his side has always supported the principles of Rukunegara as the basis of governance of this country.

"We are in full support with the call made by Tan Sri Ghazali that we should go back to the Rukunegara as the pillar of our national mindset.

"The first principle 'Belief in God' for example signifies that all religions should co-exist peacefully and teach the people to respect each other and live in peace with one another," explained Dr. Hermen.

-- BERNAMA

Copyright 2003-2004 Azlan Adnan Legal Notice

Will there ever be a 'Viagra' for women?

More Money Doesn't Mean More Sex,
But More Sex Can Make You Feel Richer

Good news for folks whose bedrooms have more activity than their bank accounts:
New research shows that sex is better for your happiness than money.

That's not to say that being financially poor but sexually active is the secret to a happy life. But despite common theory, more money doesn't get you more sex, say "happiness economics" researchers.

After analyzing data on the self-reported levels of sexual activity and happiness of 16,000 people, Dartmouth College economist David Blachflower and Andrew Oswald of the University of Warwick in England report that sex "enters so strongly (and) positively in happiness equations" that they estimate increasing intercourse from once a month to once a week is equivalent to the amount of happiness generated by getting an additional $50,000 in income for the average American.

"The evidence we see is that money brings some amounts of happiness, but not as much as what economists might have thought," says Blanchflower. "We had to look to psychologists and realize that other things really matter."

Rich Man, Poor Man: What's the Difference?
Their paper, "Money, Sex, and Happiness: An Empirical Study," recently published by the National Bureau of Economic Research, essentially puts an estimated dollar amount on the happiness level resulting from sex and its trappings.

Despite popular opinion, they find that having more money doesn't mean you get more sex; there's no difference between the frequency of sex and income level. But they do find sex seems to have a greater effect on happiness levels in highly educated -- and presumingly wealthier -- people than on those with lower educational status.

Overall, the happiest folks are those getting the most sex -- married people, who report 30% more between-the-sheets action than single folks. In fact, the economists calculate that a lasting marriage equates to happiness generated by getting an extra $100,000 each year. Divorce, meanwhile, translates to a happiness depletion of $66,000 annually.

Whether that hefty happiness income boost is the result of marital bliss or more sex is up for debate. But their "econometric" calculations confirm what psychologists have long known: People who consider themselves happy are usually richer in sexual activity.

"Many studies confirm that people who are depressed have less sex," says psychologist and sex therapist Robert Hatfield, PhD, of the University of Cincinnati and a spokesman for the Society for the Scientific Study of Sexuality. "Conversely, if you're not depressed -- 'happy,' as some might say -- you're more likely to have more frequent sex."

Does sex lead to happiness, or are happy people just more likely to lead each other to the bedroom? That's still under investigation, but there is evidence that psyche and sex feed off each other.

Semen: An Antidepressant?
Take that study in the May 2001 issue of the Journal of Sex Research, in which Georgia State University researchers found that people who are involuntarily celibate are frequently afflicted with nonhappy feelings -- anger, frustration, self-doubt, and even depression. They conclude it's the result of "missed opportunities" of living without sex.

But according to another researcher, it may not be the sex per se, but lack of semen exposure.

"Semen appears to act as an antidepressant in women," says psychologist Gordon Gallup, PhD. "In our studies, women who have unprotected sex have lower levels of depression, as measured on the gold standard evaluation tool, than those who have the same amount of sex with a condom.

"In fact, we found no difference in depression scores between women having heterosexual sex with condoms, lesbian sex, or not having sex at all," adds Gallup, of the State University of New York in Albany.

And in a follow-up study to that finding, reported two years ago in Archives of Sexual Behavior, women having sex without condoms were more likely to display depressive signs once they stopped having sex than those on a sexual hiatus whose previous partners used condoms.

"Women who have sex without condoms are also more likely to fall victim to the rebound effect following the breakup of their relationship," adds Gallup. "This suggests that there is a withdrawal effect that influences depressiveness when semen exposure stops."

Whether sex is protected or not, orgasm does trigger a release of endorphins, those "feel-good" brain chemicals that elevate mood and dull pain. "But I'm not sure that's the sole explanation, because the effects of endorphins wear off in about an hour," says Hatfield, whose money is betting on the feel-good benefits that result from touch -- especially with a spouse or other trusted lover.

"We know that people who touch and are receptive to touch are more likely to be happy and have fewer problems with depression and anxiety," adds Hatfield. "Especially in a committed relationship or marriage, sex provides more opportunity for touch. I think orgasm is Mother Nature's icing on the cake, a reason to make you want to go back for more the next time."

---

SOURCES:
Blachflower, D. "Money, Sex and Happiness, An Empirical Study," May 2000.
Gallup G, Archives of Sexual Behavior, June 2002; vol 31: pp 289-293.
Donnelly, D., Journal of Sex Research, May 2001.
David G. Blachflower, PhD; Bruce V. Raunder professor of economics, Dartmouth College, Hanover, NH
Robert Hatfield, PhD, assistant professor of psychology, University of Cincinnati and certified sex therapist, spokesman, Society for the Scientific Study of Sexuality.
Gordon Gallup, PhD, professor of psychology, State University of New York at Albany.

Sexually active women whose partners consistently use condoms are less likely to get recurrent pelvic inflammatory disease, an infection of the female genital tract that is a leading cause of infertility.

That's the report from researchers who studied 684 women, aged 14 to 37, with symptoms of pelvic inflammatory disease, for nearly three years.

The painful condition is caused by germs that travel into the upper region of the genital tract carrying sexually transmitted diseases -- STDs -- such as gonorrhea or chlamydia. Every year, a million women in the United States get pelvic inflammatory disease. More than 100,000 of them become infertile.

Condom use protected women from the disease, report Roberta Ness, MD, MPH, of the University of Pittsburgh Graduate School of Public Health, and colleagues. Women who said their partners used condoms consistently -- at least six out of 10 times -- were half as likely as infrequent condom users to have another episode of pelvic inflammatory disease.

"The finding is significant because pelvic inflammatory disease tends to recur," Ness says in a news release.

The study, which involved 13 U.S. medical centers, appears in the August 1 issue of the American Journal of Public Health.

SOURCE: Ness, R.B. American Journal of Public Health, August 1, 2004; vol 94.

~ Rumi, "Masnavi"

The outward form of things passes away, but the essence remains for ever.
How long will you be besotted with the shape of the jug? Cast aside the jug,
and seek the water. If you look too closely at the form, you miss the essence.
If you are wise, you will always pick out the pearl from the shell.

by Elizabeth Barrett Browning, English Poet, 1801-1861
Dedicated to the Love of My Life, Baizura Kamal

How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.
I love thee to the depth and breadth and height
My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight
For the ends of being and ideal grace.
I love thee to the level of every day's
Most quiet need, by sun and candle-light.
I love thee freely, as men strive for right.
I love thee purely, as they turn from praise.
I love thee with the passion put to use
In my old griefs, and with my childhood's faith.
I love thee with a love I seemed to lose
With my lost saints. I love thee with the breath,
Smiles, tears, of all my life; and, if God choose,
I shall but love thee better after death.

A minister parked his car in a no-parking zone in a large city because
he was short of time and couldn't find a space with a meter. So he put
a note under the windshield wiper that read:

"I have circled the block 10 times. If I don't park here, I'll miss my
appointment.
FORGIVE US OUR TRESPASSES."

When he returned, he found a citation from a police officer along with
this note:

"I've circled this block for 10 years. If I don't give you a ticket,
I'll lose my job.
LEAD US NOT INTO TEMPTATION."

As you lie there in your bed
With doubts and worries in your head
Your soul is ready to be bared
But in your heart you're just plain scared
You think of things that could go wrong
And the bad times seem to go on for so long
The truth is that in your heart
You really don't know where to start
Against the darkness everyday you fight
As you long to find the light
Life passes you by in a blur
You wish you knew where you actually were
You just want someone to stand by you
You wish that you could start a new
This feelings getting really old
You feel alone and in the cold
But then you fill with warmth inside
As you realize the friends right by your side
Someone with all your problems to share
For you know deep in your heart I will always be there...

by Veronique DiSorrento
EDITOR'S NOTE: Veronique DiSorrento is a self-educated sex expert.
She draws upon both experience and research to help you have a better
sex life.

Food, sensuality and sex have long been intertwined in our human
history. No surprise, of course. Eating and procreation are our two
most basic instincts -- and for many, our most favorite activities (at
least in the top five).

In ancient times, nutrition was a big concern. Food was not as readily
available, and undernourishment was a common reality. Poor nutrition
affected both libido and fertility rates, and aphrodisiacs were sought
out to not only remedy sexual anxiety or inadequate performance, but
to increase fertility.

Foods that, by their nature, represented seed or semen, such as bulbs
and eggs, were considered inherently to have sexual powers. Other
types of foods were considered stimulating because of their physical
resemblance to genitalia. In fact, aphrodisiac foods have been
documented as early as the first century A.D. by the ancient Greeks.

In any case, we all know you are what you eat. So if you want to be
sexy, you need to eat sexy food! Here's some help with the shopping
list.

Chocolate
The Aztecs and Mayans were the first to recognize the potency of
chocolate, celebrating the harvest of the cacao bean with festivals of
wild orgies. The Aztec ruler, Montezuma, reportedly drank 50 cups of
chocolate each day to better serve his harem of 600 women (not all at
once, I assume). You know what's tastiest under a drizzle of warm
chocolate sauce? Skin.

Asparagus
The ancient "Law of Similarities" said that if one thing looks like
another, it will improve what it resembles. As a phallic symbol,
asparagus proves size doesn't matter! See if your lover can control
himself when you lick Hollandaise sauce off individual spears and then
nibble them one at a time.

Grapes
Marc Anthony wooed one of the most captivating women in the world with
grapes (no, not J-Lo -- Cleopatra!), peeling each one and feeding her
the individual juicy orbs. Ladies, if you want to serve your lover
grapes, lie down and place them one at a time in your navel.

Pine Nuts
These delicate, buttery nuts have been known to stimulate the libido
since the second century. We now know they contain lots of zinc, a key
mineral in the production of testosterone. You can bake them in
cookies, or use them to make pesto. Or simply sprinkle a trail of pine
nuts on your lover's body, and nibble your way home.

Honey
From the Kama Sutra to the Bible, honey has been connected with love,
sex and sensuality. Ancient Egyptian remedies for sterility and
impotence were based on honey. And of course the "honeymoon" is based
on a Medieval tradition of newlyweds going into seclusion and drinking
mead, a fermented drink made from honey until the first new moon of
their marriage. Lipstick is icky but honey is yummy. Smear your lips
with honey and give your lover a luscious kiss.

Vanilla
The scent and flavor of vanilla is believed to increase lust.
According to the myths of the ancient Mexican Totanac culture, Xanat,
the young daughter of the Mexican fertility goddess, loved a Totonac
youth. Unable to marry him due to her divine nature, she transformed
herself into a plant that would provide pleasure and happiness
forevermore. You'll find lots of pleasure in a small carton of vanilla
ice cream. Drop cool spoonfuls on warm skin, and lick the drips as it
melts.

Libations
Alcoholic beverages have served throughout history as a basis for most
love potions, masking the foul tastes of bizarre ingredients. Of
course now we know a glass of wine, or a smooth cocktail relaxes us,
lowers inhibitions and stimulates our senses. Try a Margarita you'll
never forget. Sprinkle some salt on your lover's neck, and have him
hold a wedge of lime in his teeth. Lick the salt from his neck, drink
a shot of very smooth tequila and have him squeeze the lime in your
mouth. Oh-lay.

Oysters
These seductive mollusks have been documented as an aphrodisiac for
two thousand years. Glistening on the half-shell, with delicate petals
of tender meat, is it any wonder they look sensually familiar? They
also happen to be loaded with zinc, a key ingredient to testosterone
production. In any case ladies, if your lover loves oysters, you're in
luck! Tuck a pearl in your oyster, and let him go diving.

Get yourself ready for sleep by warming up your feet.

In addition to having a quiet, dark room to sleep in, having warm feet
also may help trigger sleepy feelings, research suggests. The body
naturally dilates blood vessels in the hands and feet and releases
heat from these extremities in preparation for sleep. Warming your
feet with socks and then removing the socks would mimic this sleep
preparation process.

RealAge Benefit: Getting 6 to 8 hours of sleep per night
can make your RealAge as much as 3 years younger.

If you can stay calm during stressful situations, it may mean a lower
risk of developing high blood pressure later in life.

In a study, researchers measured the participants' blood pressure
while they completed stressful tasks. Years later, researchers
monitored the study participants' blood pressure. Those whose blood
pressure had increased most during the initial, stressful-task phase
of the study were most likely to have high blood pressure years later.

RealAge Benefit: Keeping your blood pressure at 115/76
mm Hg can make your RealAge as much as 12 years younger.

If you're eating fish in a bid to help make your heart healthier, skip
the fish sandwich and choose a baked filet.

A recent study revealed that people who ate baked or broiled fish
at least once per week had a decreased risk of atrial
fibrillation, a heart condition characterized by irregular heart
rhythms. People who ate fried fish or fish sandwiches did not
experience any reduction in risk.

RealAge Benefit: Eating at least 1 serving of fish per week can
make your RealAge up to 2.7 years younger.

An English professor wrote the words: "A woman without her man is
nothing" on the blackboard and asked his students to punctuate it
correctly.

All the males in the class wrote:
"A woman, without her man, is nothing."

All the females in the class wrote:
"A woman: without her, man is nothing."

This is a true story

My daughter and I had just finished a muffin at Famous Amos Cafe in Bangsar
& decided to have a some cookies. Because both of us are such cookie lovers,
we decided to try the "Hawaiian Nut Cookie".

It was so excellent that I asked if they would give me the recipe and she
waitress said with a small frown "I'm afraid cannot." Well I said,"would you
let me buy the recipe?"

With a cute smile, she said YES". I asked how much and she responded,"Only
two fifty, it's a great deal!" I said with approval, "just add it to my
bill."

Thirty days later, I received my VISA statement from Famous Amos and it was
RM285.00. I looked again and remembered I had only spent RM9.95 for two
muffins and about RM20.00 for a pie. As I glanced at the bottom of the
statement, it said, "Cookie Recipe - RM250.00". That's outrageous!!!

I called Famous Amos's Accounting Dept. and told them that the waitress said
it was "two-fifty," which clearly does not mean "two hundred and fifty
dollars" by any POSSIBLE interpretation of the phrase. Famous Amos
refused to budge..

They would not refund my money, because according to them, "What
the waitress told you is not our problem. You have already seen the recipe -
we absolutely will not refund your money at this point."

I explained to her the criminal statutes which govern fraud in Malaysia. I
threatened to refer them to the Police for engaging in fraud. I was
basically told, "Do what you want, we don't care, and we're not
refunding your money. "

I waited a moment, thinking of how I could get even, or even try to
get any of my money back. I just said, "Okay, you people got my
RM250.00, and now I'm going to have RM250.00 worth of fun."

I told her that I was going to see to it that every cookie lover in
Malaysia with an e-mail account has a RM250.00 cookie recipe from
Famous Amos... for free... She replied, "I wish you wouldn't do this"
I said, "Well you should have thought of that before you stole from
me", and slammed down the phone on her.

So, here it is!!! Please,please, please pass it on to everyone you can
possibly think of. I paid RM250.00 dollars for this...I don't want
Famous Amos to ever get another sen off of this recipe...

Recipe may be halved:
2 cups butter
4 cups flour
2 tsp. baking soda
2 cups granulated sugar
2 cups brown sugar
5 cups blended oatmeal (measure oatmeal & blend in blender to a fine
powder) 24 oz. chocolate chips
1 tsp. salt
1 8 oz. Cadbury bar (grated)
4 eggs
2 tsp. baking powder
3 cups chopped nuts (your choice)
2 tsp. vanilla

Cream the butter and both sugars. Add eggs and vanilla; mix together
with flour, oatmeal, salt, baking powder, and soda. Add chocolate
chips, Hershey bar and nuts. Roll into balls and place two inches
apart on a cookie sheet.

Bake for 10 minutes at 375 degrees. Makes 112 cookies.. Have Fun!!!

This is not a joke - this is a true story... Ride free this isn't some
stupid chain letter either.. pass it on.. if you don't, you won't die
or get dumped... you'll just do the world an injustice...

JULIA JAAFAR
Journalist
New Straits Times,
31, Jalan Riong
59100 Kuala Lumpur
Tel: 03-2056 9378
Fax: 03-2282 1434

Dedicated to Shaliza Anuar of Utusan Malaysia, who still owes me RM500
since February 2003



The Hodja (teacher) was selling olives at the market and business was
slow. He called to a woman who was passing by and tried to entice her.
She shook her head and told him she didn't have any money with her.

"No problem," the Hodja grinned, "You can pay me later."

She still looked hesitant, so he offered her one to taste. "Oh no, I
can't, I'm fasting," she responded.

"Fasting? But Ramadan was 6 months ago!"

"Yes, well, I missed a day and I'm making it up now. Go ahead and give
me a kilo of the black olives."

"Forget it!" shouted the Hodja, "If it took you 6 months to pay back a
debt you owed ALLAH, who knows when you'll get around to paying me!"

When Mozart passed away, he was buried in a churchyard. A couple days
later, the town drunk was walking through the cemetery and heard some
strange noise coming from the area where Mozart was buried. Terrified,
the drunk ran and got the priest to come and listen to it.

The priest bent close to the grave and heard some faint,
unrecognizable music coming from the grave. Frightened, the priest ran
and got the town magistrate. When the magistrate arrived, he bent his
ear to the grave, listened for a moment, and said, "Ah, yes, that's
Mozart's Ninth Symphony, being played backwards."

He listened a while longer, and said, "There's the Eighth Symphony,
and it's backwards, too. Most puzzling."

So the magistrate kept listening; "There's the Seventh... the Sixth...
the Fifth..."

Suddenly the realization of what was happening dawned on the
magistrate; he stood up and announced to the crowd that had gathered
in the cemetery, "My fellow citizens, there's nothing to worry about.
It's just Mozart decomposing."

I ask whether I should seek any god besides God~~
when He is the Lord of all things.
All people will reap the harvest of their own deeds;
no one will bear another's burden.
Ultimately all of you will return to your Lord,
and He will resolve your disputes.

Those who are generous by day and by night,
both in secret and openly, will be rewarded by God.
They have nothing to fear or regret.

Those who are generous by day and by night,
both in secret and openly, will be rewarded by God.
They have nothing to fear or regret.

God does not like those who spend their wealth ostentatiously,
believing neither in God nor in the last day.
Such people are making friends with Satan -
and what an evil friend he is!

God will reward those who have faith and do good;
He will enrich them from His own abundance.
As for those who are disdainful and proud,
He will severely punish them;
and they will find that no one besides God
can protect or help them.

Amidst the morning mist of swift returning tide
I set out on my daily run, my walkman on my side.
Lost within my private world apart from cares and woes
I ran along the moistened shore, the sand between my toes.

In the distance, I saw a boy, as busy as can be.
He was running, stooping, picking up, and tossing in the sea.
Just what he threw, I couldn't tell, I looked as I drew near.
It seemed to be a rock or shell – as I approached him I could hear:

"Back you go, where you belong. You're safe, now hurry home.
You family's waiting for you, you little starfish, hurry on!"
It seemed the evening tide had washed the starfish on the shore,
And the swift receding water left thousands there or more.

And this self-appointed savoir, was trying one-by-one
To toss them back into the sea, against the racing sun.
I saw his plight was hopeless, that most of them would die.
I called out from my private world, "Hey kid, why even try?"

"Must be at least a thousand here, strewn along the beach,
And even if you had the time, most you'll never reach.
You really think it makes a difference, to waste your time this way?"
And then I paused and waited, just to hear what he would say.

He stooped and took another, and looked me in the eye.
"It makes a difference to this one sir, this starfish will not die!"
With that he tossed the little life, back where there was hope.
He stooped to take another. I could tell this was no joke.

The words that he spoke to me cut like a surgeon's knife.
Where I only saw numbers, he saw only life.
He didn't see the multitude of starfish on the sand.
He only saw the little life he held in his hand.

He didn't stop to argue, to prove that he was right.
He just kept tossing starfish in the sea with all his might.
So I too stooped, and picked up, and I tossed into the sea,
And I thought, just what a difference, that this boy had made in me.

~ Randy Poole

If you want to be happy for an hour...
...take a nap.

If you want to be happy for a night...
...get drunk

If you want to be happy for a day...
...go fishing.

If you want to be happy for a month...
...get married.

If you want to be happy for a year...
...inherit a fortune.

If you want to be happy for a lifetime...
...do gardening

- Amharic Proverb

Two men, sentenced to die on the same day, were led down to the room
where the electric chair was. The priest had given them last rites,
the formal speech had been given by the warden, and a final prayer had
been said among the participants. The warden, turning to the first
man, solemnly asked, "Son, do you have a last request?"

The man replied, "Yes sir, I do. I love dance music. Could you please
play the Macarena for me one last time?"

"Certainly," replied the warden. He turned to the other man and asked,
"Well, what about you, son? What is your final request?"

"Please," said the condemned man, "Kill me first."

An elderly Italian Jew wanted to unburden his guilty conscience by
talking to his Rabbi.

"Rabbi, during World War II, when the Germans entered Italy, I
pretended to be a Catholic and changed my name from Levy to Spumoni,
and I am alive today because of it."

"Self preservation is allowable, and the fact that you never forgot
that you were a Jew is admirable," said the Rabbi.

"Rabbi, during the war, a beautiful Jewish woman knocked on my door
and asked me to hide her from the Germans. I hid her in my attic, and
they never found her."

"That was a wonderful thing you did, and you have no need to feel guilty."

"It's worse, Rabbi. I was weak and told her she must repay me with
sexual favours, which she did, repeatedly."

"You were both in great danger and would have suffered terribly if the
Germans had found her. There is a favourable balance between good and
evil, and you will be judged kindly. Give up your feelings of guilt."

"Thank you, Rabbi. That's a great load off my mind. But I have one
more question."

"And what is that?"

"Should I tell her the war is over?"

Two women are new arrivals at the pearly gates and are comparing
stories on how they died.

1st woman: I froze to death.

2nd woman: How horrible!

1st woman: It wasn't so bad. After I quit shaking from the
cold, I began to get warm and sleepy, and finally died a peaceful
death. What about you?

2nd woman: I died of a massive heart attack. I suspected that
my husband was cheating, so I came home early to catch him in the act.
But instead, I found him all by himself in the den watching TV.

1st woman: So what happened?

2nd woman: I was so sure there was another woman there
somewhere that I started running all over the house looking. I ran up
into the attic and searched, and down into the basement. Then I went
through every closet and checked under all the beds. I kept this up
until I had looked everywhere, and finally I became so exhausted that
I just keeled over with a heart attack and died!

1st woman: Too bad you didn't look in the freezer. We'd both
still be alive.

...of the Bush Administration does it take to change a lightbulb?

The answer is SEVEN:

1) one to deny that a lightbulb needs to be replaced;

2) one to attack and question the patriotism of anyone who has
questions about the lightbulb;

3) one to blame the previous administration for the need of a new lightbulb;

4) one to arrange the invasion of a country rumoured to have a secret
stockpile of lightbulbs;

5) one to get together with Vice President Cheney and figure out how
to pay Halliburton Industries one million dollars for a lightbulb;

6) one to arrange a photo-op session showing Bush changing the
lightbulb while dressed in a flight suit and wrapped in an American
flag; and finally

7) one to explain to Bush the difference between screwing a lightbulb
and screwing the country.

This new Army Captain was assigned to an outfit in a remote post in the African desert. During his first inspection of the outfit, he noticed a camel hitched up behind the mess tent. He asks the Sergeant why the camel is kept there.

The nervous sergeant said "Well, sir, as you know, there are 250 men here on the post... and no women. And sir, sometimes the men have 'urges.' That's why we have the camel."

The Captain says, "I can't say that I condone this, but I understand about men's urges, so the camel can stay."

About a month later, the Captain starts having his own urges. Crazy with passion, he asks the Sergeant to bring the camel to his tent. Putting a ladder behind the camel, the Captain stands on it, pulls his pants down, and has wild, insane sex with the camel.

When he's done, he asks the Sergeant, "Is that how the men do it?"

"No... not really, sir! They usually just ride the camel into town where the girls are," said the Sergeant.

A Sunday school teacher of pre-schoolers was concerned that his
students might be a little confused about Jesus Christ. He wanted to
make sure they understood that the birth of Jesus occurred a long time
ago, that he grew up, etc. So he asked his class, "Where is Jesus
today?"

Steven raised his hand and said, "He's in heaven!"

Mary was called on and answered, "He's in my heart!"

Little Johnny, waving his hand furiously, blurted out, "I know! I
know! He's in our bathroom!"

The whole class got very quiet, looked at the teacher, and waited for
a response. The teacher was completely at a loss for a few very long
seconds. He finally gathered his wits and asked Little Johnny how he
knew this.

Little Johnny replied, "Well, every morning my father gets up, bangs
on the bathroom door, and yells: 'Jesus Christ, are you still in
there?'"